Picking shards of glass out of your brain hurts.  Though whenever my doctor says things like "collapse the waveform" and "network management protocol" in reference to my treatment I want to have his genius babies.

    I've been writing things solely out of my own internal mechanisms for months now.  The only ray of interesting light I've had has been the challenge to argue FOR christianity.  Which was hella fun since I totally agree with them apparently.  The point to this being that I need some fresh ideas to rant about.  I create characterizations for ( Read more... )

Sociopath?

Or self-hating solipsist.

"Bet you don't."
"Yeah right, prove it"
"No one would believe that"

Excerpts from a personally collected list of responses given by friends and loved ones on the subject of suicidal depression.

Why do I think Rodney Dangerfield is my Faerie Godfather?

I can take pictures on my phone, send them to my printer at home as an email and have it print them.  Honestly can't think of a lot of uses for this feature, but I just spent 2 hours configuring it to be so.  There's just something cool about being able to remotely generate hard-copy at will ( Read more... )

http://www.canned-bacon.com/

As the first waves of the drug rolled in on him he was assaulted by the wash of colors especially purple and gold.  Then, after an age of struggling, he pinned down the feeling and his perception wavered and narrowed to a fine blue line.  His eye twitched and the filter of a lit cigarette screwed itself into the side of a face rictus in the surge ( Read more... )

I gaze longingly at her across the table and once again beg that she leave him.  She blushes, not meeting my eye and says she cannot.  I extol her virtues hoping to perk up some interest in my crusade, but to no avail.  My flowery listings of the finer details of her beauty are cut shot with a glance ( Read more... )

It is a well known fact that I have been pushing my friends towards a career in caribean piracy since the world was cooling and to date they've been content to climb up their little yuppie financial ladders towards the rope they'll eventually end their meaningless existences with.  I guess that could be considered better game than how I allow ( Read more... )

At one point long ago my Mother made me promise that if she was ever reduced to a senile or retarded state by some incident or cruel twist of genetics that I was to kill her off without hesitation.  Further she told me that in her will she stipulated that if it was found after her death that she had succumbed to any of those maladies that her ( Read more... )