Sometimes I'm just not sure if people are twisted or stupid or both. On any given day I'm bound to hear at least ten profoundly retarded statements from people of normal intelligence who are speaking with sincerity. Take the sincerity factor out and that number rises to around fifty ( Read more... )

Last night was so much fun. It was chill, nothing big at all, just plain old fun!  Maj came to my house at like 730ish.  We hung out here for awhile before heading out.  Went to Sam's and picked up 3 Miller Lite 6pack ... pounders!  I think by the end of the night we each had 4, and were feeling pretty tipsy haha.  Brights Maj and I hung out for ( Read more... )

Last night Spencer came over and we watched The Simple Life ... duhh. It was much fun, I really have missed the days of us just sitting back and laughing out asses off at Paris and Nicole, the only thing missing was a drink in hand! But we will definately take care of that this week ( Read more... )

Glad to be home.

Trying to focos on the good.

But I keep going to back to who I recently lost.

And it pretty much sucks.

Tonight Im heading to the Dub C .... seeing Spencer :]
(and hopefully a few other west chesterians that i miss)

thats all for now.

I miss a lot of people.

I didnt think I hid myself that much from people.  Nor did I think that because Im scared of certain emotions people would walk away.

If any guy out there doesnt need his balls .... send them my way.  I'm determined to just let it all out.  But not until after I enjoy myself and relax at home with my family and friends.  But when I get back I'm ( Read more... )

theresa and i have to leave here in 2 hours .. she has yet to pack ... and WE have yet to sleep. apparently myspace is the cool thing to do at 130am. we're addicted :p and thats sad.

but i smiled tonight.
she makes me smile.

tomorrow im going home.
thats all for now.

Since I told Theresa .... I guess I can write about it.  There's a chance I might be staying home.  Weak?  YES. But my friends have always been my support.  And having people up and leave like this is too much for me.  Maybe it's because Ive been spoiled when it comes to friends.  I've always made good friends and have been able to keep them. If ( Read more... )

I can drown out the feeling .... I can be numb to this. if I can't feel, then I can't hurt and I can't bleed. Maybe that's all I need ..... Life is harder than I thought, every twist, every single turn. Fate is cruel, time's unbending to your needs .... nothing's as it seems. How do you rise above it? How do you stand so solid? Staring life in the ( Read more... )

I can't be sure that this state of mind, is not of my own design.
I wish there was an over the counter test, for loneliness.
For loneliness like this.

This is so hard. I try to pretend Im happy. But how can I be when the person who told me she'd never hurt me ... has. And okay I understand it was my fault somehow. but its still so confusing to me. But its good to know that im not the only one confused over this. i'm stuck in a place i cant get out of. i have no answers to my questions. im ( Read more... )