The Hufflepuff dorms are really nice, I think.  Not damp like the Slytherin dorms, which, now that I've seen the alternative, I'm a little bitter about. Also, it doesn't have Avery walking around with his bullocks out like some dysfunctional Viking.

Girls' cloaks cannot fit two people at once. Was fun trying, though.

[/protected]

I just took a shite for the first time in a week, and in so doing, realized that an all-meat diet is not the best idea I've ever had. Or maybe it is the best idea I've ever had and I just need a potion to counteract its painfully negative aspects. I think muggles just call it a laxative; maybe I should get one of those. Hell, maybe I should just ( Read more... )

[Private to Slytherins]

So, I'm sure you've all seen me sitting in the common room as of late, and I was wondering if any of you lucky ducks happened to know of a way to un-fuse your arse from a chair. Litterally. I'm very stuck.

[Private to Snape]

That's directed towards you, you  zero-charisma sinus supremus.

[/Private]

Your favorite potions mastermind (that's me) has had yet another breakthrough in outrageous concoctions. I call it Evan's Dandy Draft, and it will be on sale for a limited time only. Get your small bottle now while supplies last. Price is negotiable ( Read more... )

[Protected from Hufflepoofs, Cravenclaws, and Gryffindorks ( Read more... )

Alright, so, after some good wholesome jeering and taunting, I finally decided to fix Avery's face:


( Read more... )

Dear Professor Bones,

Arithmancy is ridiculous. There’s nothing special about the number 23. It’s a bloody number, and it only keeps showing up because you keep trying to make us find it. You’re utterly insane. I bet you’re bent on each of us finding 23 in 23 different settings, right? I was born on the 23rd of July; dare I ask what dreaful ( Read more... )