I need to "journal" because the doctor said it will make my brain better. My brain really confuses me sometimes, it tells me a lot of things that I don't want to hear. I want my life to be perfect and what that entails to me is going to shows, being able to walk, and having good food to eat at all times. I guess that makes me a brat ( Read more... )

tha half aware deinquent wanders this world
wondering what cuming but never what's birthed
cuz we knows real strong pain can come from happiness
but why don't you focus positive and not stress

woah postings alittle bit different its been a while. ummm I just got out of the hospital an now I have some work to do beacause Ive almost died many times so there must be something im supposed to do in this life. My mood is hungery I want som pizza. I need some sushi and to record a song if I did that all in the same day it would be such a happy ( Read more... )

I turned 19 in June and I think I'm starting to feel it. This world is a twisted cycle that traps you in it clutches and grinds you into hamburger meat then laughs in your face as it sprinkles garlic salt all over you on the barbecue over burning white hot coals. Its like Xom once said "Cut me with a belt, let the burning pain be felt, wanna feel ( Read more... )

Hi I haven't been saying anything on this shit 1) because my computer is hella slow and 2) I've pretty much been at the beach every night or at my boy ATG's house. I want to send a shout out to my long time very close friend, some of you might know him as MC candom. Anyway I love you bro there are no mistakes in God's world. And to Brian, Don't ( Read more... )

This is it my times up. I quit smoking at midnight tonight. Cigarettes that is, May 19 my first day without a cigarette. I wrote a goodbye letter which I was told to do and it came out like a piece of hate mail to Bin Laden or something. It was like the break up letter from hell. So I've discovered that I really hate what ciggarettes do to me much ( Read more... )

Everything is becoming so real. I am slowly being tugged away from my alternate universe where fantasy is truth. Things are so unknown and so scary but I know that whatever is going to happen in my life is going to be wonderful and even more unimaginable than the days preceding but that doesn't make it any less scary. I read my horoscope and the ( Read more... )

Why do I feel like crying but CAN't ( Read more... )

I would like to document this just so I can remeber. I was talking to someone about my vague sense of lonliness. It comes and goes seemingly without reason. On the outside and in my own mind I have friends that I am close to and hang out with but every so often I just get this undeniable sense of lonlieness, its the only way I can describe the ( Read more... )

I am so lucky. Not lucky like I fell asleep while driving and missed a head on collision by inches. But lucky like I played this game called life and I won love. And it feels so good. I have everything I've ever wanted besides medical insurance, but there's always Kevorkian if things get too rough. Besides that I have One year and I am fucking ( Read more... )