i want it to stop. right now.

i liked it better when i felt nothing. now i feel a pain in my chest.

i had a dream: i was a patient on the show House and they couldn't understand why i was having mini-heartattacks approx every 5 minutes. they came to the conclusion that... and i woke up. convienient right?

so i think i've decided on something...
i'm going away to school.
like out of NY.
idk where yet, but i have to get out of here.

i had a blast in NP. it was great seeing Liss and Kelly and Mel... but while we were driving thru town, i kept on getting glimpses of mine and Mike's trip up there.

it's like, no matter where i go, i'm reminded of him; and ( Read more... )

so today would've been one year... and of course i had to have a dream about him.
It started off with all the girls in FL, and we had to go fishing for some reason. We were trying to catch a shark... like seriously trying to catch a shark. anyway, we were on a boat at night; we didn't catch the shark. and we went back. as the rest of the girls were ( Read more... )

so just got this paper back today... got a 95 on it.

Happily Ever After? I Doubt It

Is a happy ending really allowed in life? I’ve asked myself this so many times in the past two years and I’m still not sure. Love in the Driest Season by Neely Tucker gave me hope that there is, but then again what happens when the pages run out?

When we’re little the ( Read more... )

www.myspace.com/trailerpark

legit. gave me chills. omg, Nov 21st can't come fucking fast enough!

i feel nothing.

that's a lie.
i feel for my friends. my girls. who've been there for me through everything.

but... i feel like there should be more.

why does this happen?

back to the cryptic lj entries.... prepare to be frustrated.
*lil hint: half the time, i don't even know what i'm talking about.

::sigh::....
alright. w/e. there's nothing that can be done.

sorry for being a good friend... i guess... (?)... idk... w/e.

this is just all so friggin exhausting.

it's not even worth it anymore.

I just had the worst dream. I dreamt I was with him and it was a normal day. We were laughing and joking around but it was like way back when, before we were together. We were being very careful not to touch, and not to say something that would make thing awkward... at least I was. He always made it look like he didn't have to try. I dreamt that he ( Read more... )

i really hate all of this, and i can't wait for the high to this low cuz it's gonna be fantastic.

looking to the future ftw. hell yeah!

idk if it's just my emotions shutting down on me, or if it's actually real, but i'm calming down. finally. i'm still pissed as fuck, but i'm holding it together better. i just wish life wasn't such a fucking bitch sometimes. It's not even my life that sucks royally right now, but when one of my close friends is hurting as bad as this... it just ( Read more... )