Had the most fucked up dream involving Logan and his family. It was at a birthday party for Sam and Simon and some how it turned into Cassie being angry at me and me being on the phone with Logan moms telling her how shitty of parents Tom and Cassie were. Then I left the house because Logan was suppose to meet me outside after a couple minutes. I ( Read more... )

I dont want to here. I dont know how many times I've said that in my life. How many times have I wished to not wake in the morning. I still cant replace him with another. I feel nothing. Nothing at all. I make no progress because I dwell. I havent the strength to care to fix anything in my life. I guess its rather sad.

At night, I can hear the cries and pleas from a women begging her husband not to. The screams of fear or of anger, the yelling. Even the door as it slams. I hear the yells, and laughs of the drunken. Or even the breaking glass as someone steals another radio ( Read more... )

i am always thinking of logan. and constantly missing sean. and feeling like im lost. or breaking down over nothing. not taking my medication. trying to be strong and content with everything. every regret. decision. look in the mirror. i dont think ive ever been so low in all the years ive been so unhappy with myself ( Read more... )

All I can tell myself is I'm not meant to be loved. I repeat constantly in my mind. And I have no clue what to do about it. I hate myself and my life. All my decisions that have got me back here to unhappiness. I dont know how to stop what I do wrong. I can't manage to consistently help myself in hopes of some balance. I just dig my hole deeper and ( Read more... )

This depression wont lift. I dont know what to do to make things better. I think I need a change, a big one. i dont feel like my place in this place is important to anything around me. I'm stuck ( Read more... )

I want to die. I dont know how many times I've said this or thought it. Yet over the seven years I've done nothing about it really. Yea I've finally got depression medicine but its doing nothing. Nothing at all. I want to kill myself, I've thought it out enough times in my head, imagining all the possible ways. I've been so lost for so long that I ( Read more... )

I just want to not exsist.

I feel like everything is going downhill again. Like I can't make any progress toward being happy. I don't want to fake happy anymore or force myself to go out and do shit when I really rather sit in my room. And I dont know what to fucking do. And its not like I have a ton of stress from school or work. So I dont know why I'm back to crying almost ( Read more... )

I hate my life. Nothing makes it feel better, not a thing ( Read more... )