Six-foot-tall, 275-pound bearded man crashes children's birthday party. Identifies himself by stating, "I am vengeance. I am the night. I am Batman." Goes into kitchen, helps himself to piece of cake, drives off in red Cadillac.

I so want to be this guy.

Two weeks left...

( OH EFF EM GEE!!!1 )

Oh man, I just farted and it smelt like the inside of Taco Bell.

And it tasted like Taco Bell too!

23 beers + 1 Shot of vodka + 15 Cigarettes = A very good time.

I just got kicked out of my dad's house for being myself and not what he wants me to be. And he took away the car.

I'm so totally punk rock now.

Saturday is Party Day.
18812 Kilfinan Street
Porter Ranch, CA
Starts @ 9
It's not required, but if you can, please BYOB.

I just saw a video done by my grandmother with my cousin singing about helping retards. All I could think was, "Fuck, why does these retards exist? WHY DON'T THEY JUST DIE!?". Then I saw my uncle Peter, who is also a retardo ( Read more... )

Old people suck. I hate them. Why don't they just die already?

Ooooh, you touched my tralala.

My ding ding dong.

Ooooh, you touched my tralala.

My ding ding dong.

Deep in the night,

I'm looking for some fun.

Deep in the night,

I'm looking for some love.

( Ooooh, you touched my tralala. )

Hey cadets, guess what! It's that time of year when all the kids are going off to school and they're looking for that last party of awesomeness. Well, if you've got the partying bug, I've got the cure! Coming soon to the Porter Ranch Ghetto is Bean's, now known as Munchies, totally tubular rockin'-out PARTY! There will mass consumption of all ( Read more... )