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[deuxsurrealiste]

I'm never takin Gui to my mum and stepdad's flat ever again. NOT EVER. It was fuckin horrible. My stepdad figured out we live in a one bedroom flat and he asked why that was if we're just mates and I was so scared he was gonna figure out we're boyfriends. I thought I was gonna be sick, but all this horrible word vomit come out instead. I just

Comments

[inthereeperbahn]

haha thats some kind of poetic justice :P sorry mate not much sympathy. i dont know why you dont just tell them. heres your choices, 1) you upset them but dont upset your bf who your supposed to be in love with, 2) you keep on hiding it even thoug its stressing you out and its got to be hurtful for him as well, just to keep some people happy what you dont even see that much and tbh it sounds sound like they know already and there just fucking with you. grow some balls and stop being a little bitch, it aint the 1700s no more, your not going to get hanged or nothing so wtf is the problem x

[deuxsurrealiste]

What do you mean 'supposed to be'? I AM in love with him! It ain't like I'm hidin him cos I'm embarrassed of him or nothin!! It's just cos I don't want my stepdad bein a cunt about it and I don't want him talkin rubbish about me to my little brothers. I mean one of them is 14 and he already knows and he don't care, but the other two are only 12. There just kids and I don't want them growin up hearin how horrible I am or sommat, cos then how are they gonna feel about me?

It's just fuckin bullshit and it ain't fair.

[inthereeperbahn]

o.O life aint fair and thats just the way it is, whats new?? if your stepdads a bastard about you around them kids its your job to make sure you see them loads and show them your a good guy and your normal and make sure tehy see which of you is right, telling lies only is going to make it look like HE is right and its something sick and weird your ashamed of and need to hide and what is THAT telling them then?? that its ok to talk shit about people til they tell lies? thats hardly beig a good role model neither you know. grow up and deal with real life like a normal person and stop making lame excuses!!!!

[deuxsurrealiste]

Mate, I know your probably right, but fuckin hell! Excuse me for feelin sorry for myself in my own journal

I KNOW I fucked up. I don't need everyone ganging up on me to tell me!

[shades_away]

...what?!? i'm so confused! i thought you were bringing gui because you were introducing him as your boyfriend. i'm not gonna pretend i know your family, but it sounds like the main problem is just your stepdad. what's the worst he'd do if he knew? i hope things get better. if you need to you know you're always welcome at mine.

[deuxsurrealiste]

No I were only bringin him cos my mum was like 'you should bring your friend to dinner' and I couldn't get out of it :/ I think she knows were more then friends but...I dunno.

You know my real dad disowned me when he found out? Like he proper disowned me. He ain't spoken to me again since. And he never even hated me before like my stepdad does.

Thanks, but I think if I woulda come over to spend the night at yours, Gui would probably changed the locks and not let me back in :P

[shades_away]

what..no i had no idea about your dad. that's horrible, i'm so sorry vic.

yeah true, considering the situation it was best that you didn't come over..hopefully things are better now?

[atrum_astrum]

I've had boyfriends that denied dating me cause cause he was white and I'm black or whatever (different parts of the same whole) and we weren't even in as committed a relationship as you and Gui seem to be and I dumped them flat on their asses before we even reached the car afterward. Sleeping on the couch and not in a skip is a pretty lenient response, because even though you didn't "mean to" you were definitely more than "a bit horrible" and that's a pretty shit icon to have used in all of this for calling him a bitch about it. Two cents, mine.

[deuxsurrealiste]

Yeah, but that's different innit? That's horrible and racist what happened to you, and this is just...I dunno...

I mean, I KNOW it ain't right what I did, but it's just cos I don't want my stepdad thinkin I'm any more of a huge disappointment than he already does.

wtf that icon I used weren't about HIM though! It's for me, cos I know I shouldn't be complaining about this.

[atrum_astrum]

Different parts, same whole. Pretending not to be with someone you care about because of someone else having a small minded opinion. It's different to what happened to me, because you're not the one being hidden and stashed away. And trust, it sucks.

Who the fuck cares what he thinks? Be a man, he's not even your biological relative and your younger brother and mum seem solid, so like Pip said, spend time with the younger boys and prove to them that your step-dad is a dick. Really you're only giving him more power and reason to make you feel like shit about yourself.

My brother's partner taught me when I was young that no one can make you feel guilty but yourself. Seems like you're letting someone else tell you how to act and feel. Where's the bravery or respect in that?

[bikini_bamalam]

Telling the truth is ttly never as bad as u think - u shd just call. Like, where Gui can hear and then beg 4 forgiveness cuz it must suck coming out but not as much as being dumped on by some1 u love???

[deuxsurrealiste]

I never thought Gui was gonna dump me for it, though. I mean...do you think he will? D:

I know...I should just phone them up or sommat an tell them. I guess it'd be better than doin it in person, cos if it don't go well I can just hang up on them

[bikini_bamalam]

No, I meant u dumped all over his feelings but tbh if I was him I wld probs dump u bc that was a rly shitty thing 2 do. Like, I understand that ur scared 2 tell but that doesnt mean u have 2 lie u kno?