how can someone be so dispaired by life and so fed up with it that they just end it? i've been to the point of complete and utter exhaustion with the bull shits of the world and my life...and been to the point where i feel like i can't take it anymore...but i push myself to make it through the day to wake up the next morning. how can you just ( Read more... )

If you read this, even if i don't speak to you often,

you must post a memory of me.

It can be anything you want, it can be good or bad,

just so long as it happened.

See what people rememeber about you...

so last night i was looking for some pictures under my bed in this box of memories i have stored under there. i grabbed what i thought was this particular box, and rummaged through it. well, as it turns out...it wasn't what i was looking for...but being the ADD person that i am, i got distracted and lost sight of the real reason i was under my ( Read more... )

sometimes i find myself missing it so much....i just start to cry. i can't help but weep over the past....having something i loved so much.....and then giving it up. it's like the memories grab a-hold of me and latch on so tight, that the only way to relieve myself of this pain is to cry.

it's hard describing how i feel...it's almost like this blank lonely feeling........the one you get when something is all of a sudden non-existent in your life, and there's nothing to fill that gap it took up in your heart. i left a huge portion of my heart to stay in the past...and it's hard living with out it. it was my life...my love...my ( Read more... )

so i guess you could say that it's been a good day. nothing to really complain about. getting up this morning was exceedingly difficult...more difficult than usual. i had finally gone to bed last night at 3 o'clock after reading for hours...trying to make myself stay away for just a little bit longer so i can be that much closer to being done. ( Read more... )

it seems like school means nothing to me anymore. i want to care about it and do well in it....but i just can't bring myself to care enough about it. i know it will show on my next report card...and im just betting on things i will be grounded from. haha ::sigh:: oh well. i just don't do well in school...i don't like it at all. i love to ( Read more... )

last night i couldn't sleep. i was up until 2 o'clock in the morning reading, and cuddling with my cat. then all of a sudden sleep hit me and i was out like a light until my alarm clock screamed at me this morning in an annoying, nagging sort of way. alarm clocks really are a drag, aren't they? so pestering. so obnoxious. yet so needed to ( Read more... )

so today i was as lazy as lazy gets. i missed work as a result of being sick...and initially woke up this afternoon at 2:45. GO ME!!!! i woke up and the day looked like it was only 9:30 AM...and i went downstairs to find my mother in her pj's still...so if it weren't for the fact that there's clocks on every freakin wall of the house...i could ( Read more... )

and so i return to live journal yet again. <3 i apologize for my lack of consistancy on this thing...but i hardly ever think of it! i don't remember to update anymore. myspace has unfortunately taken its place. but hopefully i'll be more loyal to this, and less to that. myspace is the devil i tell you. it's addicting and it lures you in. ( Read more... )