"House"

[dolphinops]

We moved into our house about a week ago. During this time we have determined that whatever handyman Costley and Co. (I still find it funny that they actually use that name) use, he's a dumbfuck. The chain on the backdoor was on backwards (so that when you open the door, it's really easy to unhook). The pump in the basement doesn't remove water, it

Comments

[__sunshine__]

I'm probably going to have to get a job.

Look, I know what you said about quitting the life, but if we could make one last big score, we'd be set for life. All we have to do is head down to Kentucky and hit Fort Knox for all it's worth. After that, we can spend the rest of our lives relaxing on golden lawn chairs at a gold plated beach whilst sippin' on molten gold with two shots of Skoal in it. (Two shots instead of one because we're rich.)

[flamingtiki]

fort knox has a lot less gold in it than you would think. i don't know why, but in recent years, the stockpile shrunken considerably. either that or gold is just worth less.

[flamingtiki]

therefore, i vote we just rob a casino instead.

[__sunshine__]

Yeah, let's get that new casino they're building in Orange County. We'll orchestrate a daring and needlessly complicated swindle and make millions! Do you hear me?! MILLIONS.

[__magimus__]

Yea for new house!!

I've been meaning to send a care package...but I can't think of anything Luckily Charlie has the giant Jesus I sent that should be good for something...what should I send you guys? I want to send a gift!!

[chully]

What? Huge Jesus? Are you talking about the same "Charlie"?
I mean, i just wish i knew what you were talking about, but i can't say I have a giant Jesus. :(
And Shit. i mean, goddamn. The repair crew IS handicapped. I can't wait till we walk through the house with someone from Costley & Co. The house has some downright charming aspects, but it has far more aspects that turn out to be really jank if you peer at them for half a second.
I'm not bitter.
Just send us the LORD.

[__magimus__]

Charlie!!! I sent you a HUGE puzzle Jesus in July! Oh no!!! I'm very upset. I dumpstered it from the church near my house and sent it to you. Oh this is very dissapointing. Perhaps I sent it to the wrong address and some evil person has your giant Jesus. Shoot. He was a 3ft long puzzle. It was hilalrious...

[rachiestar]

You sent the puzzle to ME, silly. ;-)