good bye

i'm sick of this journal; some one give me a new lj code so i can be a recluse and not tell any of you about it

i'm afraid of just becoming space.
a meaningless drone that walks
the earth and feels no passion,
or rather any human emotion.
when really, if i would have
looked in the mirror, i
would have realized.

once you awake in the
morning just because you
have to is when you learn to accept it.

sometimes, i have dreams that i'm at school, and my day is long and tiring. i will wake up thinking a day has passed, only to find out it's still the same day.

this must be what hell is like.

tonight, is a jefferson airplane night.

i think, i'm begining to like the color, as it slides down my fingers, creeps and in the valleys of my nails, and smears on the back of my hand.

i've been getting
nose bleeds once
or twice a day
for the past week
or so, or i will
wake up to a puddle
of blood on my pillow.
and i can't help
but think that it
can't be a good sign
when myself is trying
to escape from myself.

i picture silhouettes of men, hunched over like dogs against carved dirt canvas floors. in every burst, the sun is re-born. but in all it's fury it's feared, men hunch under tin can helmets, almost as second nature. the moon is lost in smoke, emitting a dull glow that spreads through the night. shooting stars are born, and i'm sure as a few watch, ( Read more... )

everything has been setting in lately. pupil cloud faucets pour ocean-watered salt tears down glazed over rain cloud eyes, and it's all that has been catching my attention. it's almost like nothing that has mattered to me before will ever matter again: emotion, names, image, vanity, girls, love, everything, even music. everything has been fading ( Read more... )

i'm done for a while.