and lovely laughing- oh it
puts the heart in my chest on wings
for when I look at you, even a moment, no speaking
is left in me.
-sapphoGod keeps teaching me things i didn't mean to learn, and i'm a stubborn, petulant, often unwilling student. those are the worst kind, i know from experience...isn't it interesting how the things we despise most in ( Read more... )

oh man. i can't remember the last time i posted. i suppose i haven't had much inspiration to write anything worth saving and sending out into the void of cyberspace...and the moments that inspiration has come upon me, i've had better ways to use it, such as by typing out endless listening logs for symphonic lit, trying to think up brilliant fiddle ( Read more... )

when i left the house at five after seven this morning, i walked outside to find that all of pompano beach was covered in mist. it was hanging just above the ground and stretched up to the sunrise, or what was left of it, and the millions of tiny droplets of water hit my cheeks and eyelashes and fingertips and ankles and made the ungodly hour and ( Read more... )

so opposed to popular belief, i'm still alive...much to the chagrin of my schedule, which has tried it's very best to eat me alive. but two class-dropping forms and fifteen dollars later, resulting in the absence of covenant singers AND three credit choral conducting from my life, i'm doing much better now than i've been for the last few weeks. :: ( Read more... )

tomorrow i'm playing at holly breslin's wedding and reception, then i'm off to catch a plane to fly to washington, where i'll be until wednesday. cheap plane tickes and best friends are such happy things. i am in desperate need of a break from my ever-so-relaxing work-practice-work-sleep-practice routine, so this is exactly what i need ( Read more... )

my day started out with a trip to the dentist to get a cavity filled, and trips to the dentist are what my nightmares are made out of, so it wasn't exactly a promising beginning. i was a brave little girl, though, and i sat still while they poked and prodded and stuck me with needles and gave me so much novocaine that half my face went numb. two ( Read more... )

yeah, it hasn't been the greatest night. i was tempted to fly to alaska, buy five gallons of starbucks java chip ice cream, drive to valdosta to see steph, feign death by emotional overload...anything to escape the heartache of my family. tonight i felt once again that the issues that loom above our life are a presence, a monster that i can't even ( Read more... )

it's amazing how much life is like practicing violin. things always have to get worse before they get better. it's not until you tear everything apart -even if you've convinced yourself you have it all together- and slowly, painfully, meticulously figure out each bow stroke, each finger placement, each angle, bringing every note into perfect ( Read more... )

when i'm upset, i run. anywhere. to change my surroundings, to remember that sometimes you have to make yourself breathe, to move the pain to my legs and my lungs, to try to run faster than my skin so i don't feel like it's swallowing me whole. but i always run in a circle; i always end up where i started. and so it's not really running ( Read more... )

while my sneakered feet dangled off the edge of the dock today, i had a moment that was made up of a bird call, a clap of thunder, the slap of a fish flapping on top of canal water, and the roar of an airplane flying overhead, all at the same time. which meant that i was asked to stay and listen, to run and hide, to look down into the water, and to ( Read more... )