To all the beautiful women currently in Somarium!

I have need of your assistance in an upcoming battle. My rival, you see, has a rather amusing aversion to those who are, shall we say, 'well-endowed.' Your presence alone would be more than enough to assist me in gaining victory. If any of you feel able to join me in this, please contact moi

( I think I need more sleep... )

Bonjour! This is indeed the mailbox of the one and only Dark Adonis, the Demon Lord Vyers. Clearly, I am currently preoccupied with matters of great importance, but as you must greatly want to contact moi, leave a message and I shall endeavour to respond.

[OOC: IC or OOC comments, either or is fine.]

( Yay for cuts )