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mansonchick13 died when we were teenagers. She was paralyzed from the waist down following a car wreck she was in with her family as a child. She underwent constant operations. After the last operation, her blood pressure dropped so low in her sleep that she just died. endlessdelusion committed double suicide with his wife in August of 2014 shortly before his birthday. A year ( Read more... ) -
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I wasn’t born a let’s-talk-about-this-shit kind of person. I thought about shit all the time, but I didn’t talk about shit. That wasn’t a skill I even started to develop until I was 11 and wasn’t actually proficient at until I graduated college. I don’t know why. I just didn’t talk about things, I didn’t tell anyone things. I’m still that way to a ( Read more... ) -
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Still not dead.
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Going On Decades
I’ve had this journal for well over half of my life now. It has lasted longer than boyfriends, jobs, living arrangements, and even marriages. I’ve made lifelong friends here, people I still talk to and still dearly love, who have been friends with me for also more than half of my life. I haven’t used this journal much over the last decade, but I ( Read more... ) -
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Sometimes, I write in my sleep. No, I don’t mean that I get out of bed and sleepwalk to a pen and paper. I mean sometimes when I’m writing the next day to-do list, I’m exhausted and groggy and sitting so still puts me to sleep. But instead of just dropping the pen when I doze off, I continue to write. But what I write has nothing to do with my to- ( Read more... ) -
Things I know now that I wish I knew then
1. Just like other people don't determine your latent talents and aptitudes, other people also don't determine your self-worth.
2. Your self-esteem also shouldn't be based on what other people do and say because other people do and say a lot of stupid, selfish, and blatantly wrong shit.
3. A person's values determine how that person will behave ( Read more... ) -
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Jay bought me a dirt bike and full armored matching gear. We got up when it was still dark last weekend and loaded the bikes up to go riding. I fell off twice lol. I asked him if he'd take me skydiving and instead of saying no, he said he even knew a place to go. Why am I not surprised? So skydiving is on the to-do list this summer. At some point ( Read more... ) -
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There has been a lot of conflict, bad blood, and unpleasant exchanges between my exhusband and I, but the reason behind our failed marriage can be summed up into one sentence: I got tired of listening to him. The endless nagging, bitching, complaining, critizing, opining, and lecturing -- I just got fucking sick of it. He's the kind of person who ( Read more... ) -
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ssSoooooooo -
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It's strange that I haven't updated in so long.
I got a divorce. I (re)met my soulmate. I'm almost done with school. One of my best friends, endlessdelusion and his wife killed themselves together. I still can't believe they're gone. I keep seeing his name and number in my phone, and for a brief moment I think about texting him before I remember he's dead. I ( Read more... )