I miss having a best friend...

I crawled out from the pain of yesterday ( Read more... )

How do you forgive someone who destroyed your life? How do you forgive someone who betrayed you in a manner worse than death? I would have been better off if she had just killed me in my sleep before breaking up with me... at least then I would have died happy. How can she sit there and say that she cares about me, and still realize that she broke ( Read more... )

I hate going from best friend to second-string friend. I'm being treated like the substitute, the sixth man. I'm only interesting when no other friends are around. I'm only fun when no other friends are available. I don't deserve this kind of treatment. A person hangs out with a best friend, not because it's an obligation or it's comfortable, but ( Read more... )

Someone actually told me straight to my face last night that I was a physically attractive guy. It was a good feeling. Even something as small as that matter-of-fact compliment meant alot to me. There were no selfish intentions, no alterior motives, no expectations for reciprocation, no sexual inuendo, just a genuine compliment. If I could receive ( Read more... )

Rape me ( Read more... )

Some people might think I'm gay for listening to Avril Lavigne, but the fact is, her lyrics have so much truth in them it's scary sometimes. Like with Happy Ending, that's not just a song, it's a fucking biography about my life lately. Just interchange the male pronouns with female pronouns and it's my story word for word. Now I'm not saying her ( Read more... )

Maybe I'm going about all of this in the wrong way. Apparently, my views are fucked up because I watched too much TV as a kid and I have all of these fantasies about what love and romance should be. So, if I've already identified the problem, why can't I start living by the standards held by the rest of the world? I mean, why bother trying to be ( Read more... )

Oh, and by the way, apparently I can still feel pain after all... TREMENDOUS amounts of pain. How many times can a man die inside before it physically kills him?

There's little doubt in my mind now. I'm going to die alone. Whatever happened to love? What the fuck is wrong this shithole world? We're taught to believe in certain values, but the real world never lives by those standards. I'm going to die alone.