In any given break-up, the easiest and most painless "quick-fix" solution, if you will, also happens to be the best route toward recovery. The complete and total cessation of communication is, by definition, breaking up in its indefectible and consummate form. And though I haven't quite figured out why this concept remains so difficult for people I ( Read more... )

The first time you hear a gunshot on your street, it sounds like a firecracker, and the illusion of a kaleidoscope of colors exploding in the sky is a light pink floral cover on an otherwise gruesome but eye-opening Quentin Tarantino script. To a panicky listener in the dark, who grew up on nighttime stories of faulty analogies ("splinter is to ( Read more... )

My ex-boyfriend, my first love, who I dated for 3 years 5 years ago, called me recently to tell me he was gay. "YOU ARE NOT," I retorted. "You CAN'T be," I said, thinking of multiple incidents in the past that had proved to me again and again that he wasn't. "No," he says, "I am, and I haven't really dated anyone seriously since you, and that was ( Read more... )

Can I go back to school now? I am fine, but the Oklahoma City metropolitan area is very stupid. I am not sure that the days are passing at all. I sleep; I drive around; I wait for my mother to leave, leave, leave leave leave! She keeps making up excuses for missing exciting parts of her social life. "You think it’s OK to go to job interviews in ( Read more... )

Today I woke up, and for the first time realized the following ( Read more... )

A fat, balding man wearing a flannel shirt buttoned only halfway up so that his greasy chest hairs sprang from his chest like long and curly pubic hair gave me a yellow rose wrapped in sheer plastic today. I threw it away, petals pointing down, completely disgusted, and sickly flattered.

To my neighbors: You like fireworks. Correction: You like loud fireworks. Pretty colors make me happy too, but 2 am is a little late to be going kaboom. I go to bed at 1 and wake up at 7. Let’s get together and schedule something out. What day is good for you ( Read more... )

I am looking out the window, thinking about the elderly, and about the nature of aging. And about entropy. I would like to learn jiujitsu, unless they make me hyphenate it. I want to hyphenate "kung fu" but the lawmakers, the slush-fund-takers, the heartbreakers, the butchers the bakers and the Los Angeles Lakers, they insist on the "correct," ( Read more... )

FRIENDS ONLY, SUCKERS.

Comment to be added, and tell me your all-time favorite cd.