I don't even know why I bother anymore. I will never be thinner. I will never be beautiful or smart. I will always just be someone's second choice.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

As much as I love my life right now I hate it. It's not really that I hate my life. I hate this not knowing. When the semester started I found out that the apartment complex wasn't going to renew my lease. Not a big deal would give me 3 months to figure it all out. A friend of mine wanted to sublet his apartment to me so I thought the situation was ( Read more... )

So, a few months ago Daddy told me that they found a few houses that
they were interested in but they were out in New Orleans. I was shocked. I remember feeling like someone punched me in the stomach. I know it isn't very far and had been in several relationships with people in NOLA.
Well, Daddy and Jessa are still moving. Down the street! I'm ( Read more... )

I love my Daddy and Jessa. They are my family and make my world/life a better place.
But Him, I'm falling in love with Him. With everything about Him. Everything I know, and everything I don't know. I want to face His battles with Him. I want to help Him heal His wounds and not just have Him wipe away my tears. That's part of what Daddy and Jessa ( Read more... )

I wish I could take it back... I wish I could fucking take it all back. I don't want to feel like this anymore. I don't want to be emotionally attached to any fucking body. I want to scream. I want to be able to say I'M FUCKING ANGRY AT YOU! But I can't. I'm not angry at him/her/them/it. I'm angry at me. Angry I allowed myself to become attached. I ( Read more... )

I think that Charlie Brown quote by Sally is perfect for what I have been dealing with. In February my brother Bill and his fiance sold me her van. The asking price was $2000.00. When I test drove it, it died. They took it to my half brother's shop. His name is Robert. A few weeks later Bill gave me the van. He drove it to my place to make sure ( Read more... )

That graduation is in 2 weeks. I purchased my cap and gown today ( Read more... )

there was a lost woman wandering around in circles waiting for someone to love her. One day she met a man who was even more lost than she was. She was in shock as not many had seen or felt the trauma that she had felt and been through in her life. He had. He made her look sane. He made her look optimistic about life. He made her feel beautiful and ( Read more... )

Today I've been thinking about some people. Wondering about them. Even missing them ( Read more... )

So, it's been rather strange as I have not had human interaction except via online or the telephone with another person in exactly a week. I went to a meeting at BRCC last Tuesday but haven't been out since ( Read more... )