i held you in my arms, so fragile you seemed. and i realized that everything before this moment no longer matters. that all the strength i had from being so weak before was gone. That all you needed was someone to hold you, and someone needed to hold me.

sorry its so long.  i just needed to put my thoughts somewhere.
dont mind me.

last night made me realize a lot of things. i drink too much. and its ending today. today i will stop drinking.
i ended up playing a couple drinking games. and just kept drinking.. ended up drinking a bottle of UV.
yes. a whole bottle. along with 2 mikes hard.
and this is ( Read more... )

we were the cute couple. the oh so loving ones. Everyone always let us know that we were cute together, looked like we had it made.
its crazy how much time can change everything.

i sit here. drained from all the emotions from these years.

and i start to think that maybe this is what we need. you just dropped everything and left. sometimes i hope you ( Read more... )

I cant sleep well anymore. And since i relapsed. it doesnt make anything better.

I had this dream;

that you were standing there staring at me. Its pouring outside. And we are just standing there. I was shaking from the cold rain, or maybe it was my anger. but i couldnt tell. I dont even know if i was mad... i think at this point, i'm just numb. I'm ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

I wanna be rich and I want lots of money,
I don't care about clever I don't care about funny,
I wan't loads of clothes and fuck loads of diamonds,
I heard people die when theyre trying to find them,
And I'll take my clothes off, and it will be shameless,
Cuz everyone knows it's how you get famous,
I'll look at The Sun & I'll look in the Mirror,
I'm on the ( Read more... )

im exhausted.
im taking on too much i realize, but my sister doesnt really have anyone else that can
really help her. Ive been up for almost 16 hours. and i just realized my finacial state is not so good. So here i sit, going through transactions and what the hell i spent my money. easy. my sister. it just didnt make any sense how i would spend 122 ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

there are so many things i need to do. people i need to catch up with. more tattoos i need to get. haha. i've designed a couple im quite pleased with so i need to get a move on ( Read more... )

It wasnt clear to me until i said the conversation we had outloud. when I retold it. And then it made sense. It was very clear that it was something you just didnt know how to tell me. or maybe you just didnt agree, that it really didnt matter to you anymore. And before, when i had said,  I dont matter to you, the way you matter to me anymore. now ( Read more... )