A co-worker has decided to spread slander about me. Mature, right? Can you believe she's ten years my senior ( Read more... )

Also, I'm a jealous bitch.

That goes without saying.

Once upon a time, I would have been asked if I wanted to go to a organization's formal...

Now I'm barely lucky enough to be asked how I am.

I'm fine, by the way. Even if I wasn't, would you even care? Or notice?

Also, I lied.

There are days, that no matter where I go, or who I'm with.. I feel completely alone. It's a hopeless feeling. Desperate. Mildly panicking.

I miss my friends. I miss brothers and sisters. I miss being with people I care about and who care about me.

I could go for a hug right now.

This is one fucked up journal. I am one terrible person. I need to start over and anew or something. But honestly? if I got a new journal... I wouldn't post in it, not really. Not at all. Oh well.

I just got fired.

First time for everything, right?

I guess. It's still humiliating.

And scary. I don't know what to do now...

Sometimes, the only thing that keeps me going is knowing that someone that makes me insanely happy, is happy with me ( Read more... )

I'm in one of those moods again. The one that I hate and I've been trying to avoid -- the one that makes me into the Heather I've been trying to fix and make into a better person because that Heather is a truly hideous person, a paranoid person. I become accusatory. I become nasty. I don't like it. It's a paranoid mood, that's for sure, complete ( Read more... )

You're not happy with your lot in life, but not willing to change it, or work with what you have. You don't believe in God, so you don't believe that God will help you. You refuse that option, you refuse to believe in God's love, in that path walked. You're empty without God, but you don't see it, you don't understand what you're missing. So who do ( Read more... )

There's just something about him. I find a little bit more of my life revolving around him with each passing day. He keeps me centered, he keeps me balanced. It's like a little notch has been filled. That gaping hole in my heart is not so noticable, because he's just filling everything in around it. I feel life settling back in, the natural rhythm ( Read more... )