I can't imagine my life without Nick and even Charlie. The thought of it makes me cry almost hysterically.

That Nick says my sexual abuse happened 30 years ago and I need to just let it go. I can't keep using my PTSD as a crutch and he blames a lot of my behavioral changes on my medications. This coming from someone I practically had to force to see a doctor to get his first round of STD testing done in 10 years. I test every 3 to 6 months, so he's ( Read more... )

According to Nick, my pre-surgery anxiety is bullshit and he WILL NOT accept that he may just have to deal with my moods until the surgery's done. According to Nick, I'm totally bat shit crazy, and he has been lying to me about why we haven't had sex for months now...the real reason being I'm a wretched bitch and that doesn't exactly make him want ( Read more... )

So, I was asked not to post this to facebook (by Nick), so I'm posting it here ( Read more... )

I took all of the ex's information out of my cell phone, blocked him on facebook and various other sites, and it feels good. He's not going to change, and I have a lot of people in my life that love me for me, so I'm going to focus on those people and stop being sad because HE doesn't really want me. Nick said yesterday that he was definitively ( Read more... )

While Nick has somehow managed to basically shut Erik out of his life, I still hang on to a small thread of hope that we could be friends again. I've texted with him a couple of times, but he still has me blocked on certain cruising websites and hasn't added me back to his facebook. He said he wants to take things "on a day by day basis" but what ( Read more... )

Somehow Dinkum (my pug) managed to injure his eye quite badly. There's even talk of him losing his eye completely, but he needs to see a specialist and we just don't have the money for that. So, I'm reaching out to anybody that knows us/Dinkum and anybody who loves animals for some assistance. The initial exam and consultation is $103, and any ( Read more... )

SO, months ago I messaged this really hot guy on manhunt asking if he wanted to hang out or play or something to that affect, but I didn't get a response...until last Monday. We hung out and it was just like "wow" we all totally clicked! Since then, he's spent the night like 4 times, we've had dinner, watched movies, had some pretty deep ( Read more... )

So, we've met this guy...it was purely by chance, and for only one night, but I'm completely head over heels for him. Nick and I have talked of adding another to the relationship for quite some time, and I think it's finally happening. He's in Connecticut right now (his hometown) trying to figure some things out, but his feelings are quite mutual ( Read more... )

So, yesterday we got to bring Grandma's remains home. The urn Mom picked out is amazingly beautiful. Even the funeral director gasped when he saw it. Yes, he is a queer. Even little podunk towns like this one have the homos. LOL Anyway, I've learned that having someone or something cremated and keeping its remains makes the grieving process ( Read more... )