i don't understand how every time i get ready for something, it never happens...like i seriously spend probably 3 hours cleaning my room and stuff because i thought that i was going to have someone come over and hang out....not anymore.....i want to cry, but then i don't because i dont want to waste anymore feelings on people who don't care about ( Read more... )

I do, I like him, I wish he was here all the time....this is probably sooo bad right now.

god see heres the same dilemma again....is it really bad that i want to talk to him every day and that i wish that we could hang out and that i'm worried because people say things and that doesn't mean it will happen.....i guess i'm nervous, i guess i've never had a relationship or any form of one with a guy when I wasn't manic and basically full ( Read more... )

i don't even understand, i don't know how to explain how much of a wreck i am sometimes and that you don't realize it and how afraid i am to mess anything else up...i shouldn't like someone yet, but i do and i don't like how i feel like an open door and anything can just come right in, like i'm afraid if i let you in that so much other things will ( Read more... )

YOU MAKE ME WANNA SCREAM!!!

What do I know anymore, life is one big tangled mess and sometimes, I don't want to even bother trying to sort myself out.

It seems that when people reach their twenties, it's all about meeting people and going to bed with them. And I'm involved in barely any to none of this. It's really sad to think that I am even worse than an unhappy married couple, because even when they can make peace, they can make love, unlike myself, there's only one of me. And while the boys ( Read more... )

How do I know what is right for me, what medication, what dosage, how do I know that the thoughts in my head are my own, that I say what I want and have control over the words coming out of my mouth, how much longer will I have to apologize for things I've said without thinking or judgement, how much longer can all this go on ( Read more... )

Most importantly, my dad, (what you don't realize is that is a daily battle fought with vomit and headaches anc rashes) doesn't ask how I'm doing every day and what kinds of medication I am still on, is it chaning, I'm sure he doesn't know that today I changed from 300 to 450. Stupid shit like that really pisses me off, because yeah, I'm the one ( Read more... )

to chris, the only parts i meant about you, was that you annoy me a lot and sometime i'd just wish you'd be quite. You don't always have to scream or say what you want, sometimes people just shut up on their own and don't constantly mouth off.