A year later- my job interview, graduation, finishing that shitty hell of a capstone placement. Here I am ( Read more... )

So, it occurs to me that maybe my perception of myself as a good cook is faulty. I have, currently, no evidence to support the idea I am a good cook, other than my own personal satisfaction. Absolutely nobody in my life seems to actually enjoy anything I make very much. Sure, Scott eats my cooking, and supposedly even likes some of my dishes, but ( Read more... )

The summer has officially started for the kids. With this milestone, I can't pretend it isn't Summer any more ( Read more... )

This past week DH and I, on a luxuriant week of vacation away from the kids, watched all of Luther (TV series) starring Idris Elba ( Read more... )

The thing about bad choices is that they are not default, but selected. You can't know what would have happened otherwise. Maybe it was the best choice.

Sometimes you grasp to what you see available, rather than wait for things to appear. Sometimes the clock's ticking makes you do things you'd never otherwise do.

There is no way to totally avoid

The good news is that I'm getting better at waking up at 4:00 and 5:00am. At first, it seemed impossible, as did going to bed at a time that made that feat less than absolute torture. The body adapts ( Read more... )

I imagine that people who do a lot of complaining were fortunate enough to have a parent who did respond to their crying when they were a baby. Most likely not productive responding, but neurotic and anxious responding. But that's irrelevant. We know that fully neglected babies like those in orphanages, learn to stop crying completely ( Read more... )

I'm so old now that my oldness isn't even a new thing.

Yes, yes, the alternative is not preferable. Old means, if anything, not [yet] dead.

Is that a good thing?

Who knows what death is? Maybe its a favor, a release.

I love big cities. My favorite tourist activity is to pretend I'm not a tourist. I like grocery and drug stores and easy takeout. I like discount shopping and walking and mass transit.

I was born in the wrong place. I was made for the big city.

Sometimes I want to somehow unzip my heart and let it drain out. Maybe it would be more like a butterfly release ( Read more... )