well, i miss carolyn. i don't feel sad, but i am definitely noticing more and more that i am alone. it isn't a bad thing, but it just something that will take getting used to. i miss my other friends that aren't here with me (monica, pati, brian, jeremiah, matt, tim, alee, angela, jeff, eidon, matt, kira)... everyone has been so nice and ( Read more... )

well, last night was pretty awesome for me. i worked all day yesterday (at the genius bar because we were short a genius), and in the middle of work, haman asked me if i wanted to go to dinner with some people. well of course, i love food, and i love hanging out with people, and i love people from work, so of course i wanted to go. it was agreed ( Read more... )

well, i haven't written for a few days cuz, well, i haven't felt the need to write. i have been thinking about stuff, and i have been missing carolyn, and not exactly feeling lonely, but definitely noticing that i am alone, especially when i am alone at night in bed. right now, i am missing the physical aspects of our relationship, especially ( Read more... )

in other news, i just got back from the gym. i am really glad i am enjoying exercising. not only will it make me healthier, but also more attractive to the ladies.. so i can go lady...ing in the future. i mean, i have some extra weight i can afford to lose for the ladies and for my health, so why not... something nice and cool happened while i ( Read more... )

well, on a different topic for once in my journal, an exciting thing in my future. i am going to europe in december (from december 7th to january 4th) and will be spending 4 weeks (split into about 1 week increments) in: london, england; cologne, germany; berlin, germany; amsterdam, netherlands ( Read more... )

well, today was another good day. i had to get up at 6:30 for work, so i showered, ate breakfast (weird), and then went off to work. a quick day at work, with no feeling bad, and then off back home (without an empty feeling, without feeling aimless, without feeling lost). i got chipotle burrito (mmmm, yes four m's) and went to hollywood video to ( Read more... )

i want to thank you from the bottom of my heart, and with all my love, for effecting the changes that have happened to me recently. i am a completely different person because of you and because of the loss i have had to endure and the emotions that i have had to deal with. you taught me how to love, and you were the first person that i ever had ( Read more... )

well, i have had a day (i am not sure of the right adjective) and thanks to nicole hackett, a wonderful friend that i have never really connected with on an emotional level before, i have turned a new page in my life... for the first time today, i realized that carolyn and i were truly not friends. i came to this realization on my way back from ( Read more... )

wandering aimlessly, completely lost, no purpose in life...
WHAT DO I DO?

I AM SO ALONE, I CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE
I CAN'T EVEN BREATHE, I AM BEING SUFFOCATED BY MY EMOTIONS......................

WHY????