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Everything that runs through my mind is some form of emotional torture for me, I hold onto it because that seems better to me. There is only the few people who I can talk to about what is running through my head but I end up in situations where those sorts of conversations can't happen whenever I need to have them. I have a lack of enthusiasm, when ( Read more... )

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Reading Sontag (Regarding the pain of others) and a bit of Debord has made me a bit depressed.

From Sontag: ".. the vast maw of modernity has chewed up reality and spat the whole mess out as images. According to a highly influential analysis, we live in a 'society of spectacle'. Each situation has to be turned into a spectacle to be real - that is ( Read more... )

Ew. Whenever I accidentally leave my door open when I am in the house it gets the smell of Ashers room. .its well gross. Right now a mixture of stale beer and toothpaste.

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I am nervous about the exhibition night; I am so excited about it I know that I am going to be bitterly disapointed again and it will end in me in a sad mac costume. Damn myself for getting excited!

I wake up always thinking the same thing as well.

The lack is making me feel quite pointless. I wish I could understand people better, then I wouldn't worry so much. .maybe?

And everynight I fall asleep thinking the same thing, thats why its always in my dreams. (But I think you know that)