this is my last livejournal entry to the public. its too fuckin messy and i didnt feel compltely right going into it and i still dont feel right about it now. im using it as some kind of tool and its just too dangerous and im too indecisive to keep this. im intervening and taking it away from myself. so goodbye ladies and gents. but this doesnt ( Read more... )

if i was good, i'd tell everyone i know ( Read more... )

spaghettomingo: i need to ask you somethin ( Read more... )

i yelled at gerald today. I'm truly sorry hun. i did not mean for it to extend as far as it did, and i think we should talk about this if you're ready...rationally. I have some explanations to rattle off ( Read more... )

i fell outta touch. ive been so catatonic about things. i cant seem to stir up intense emotions outta myself. talking and relating to most people these days is like playing a video game..i do it on automatic and i cant see the stakes involved with what i say. i feel dead inside. and im not sleepy and im not awake. and i'd say it was because i ( Read more... )

im tide. T-I-D-E tide. blair and i are at my grandmas house.im struggling with alotta things in my life. im trying not to complain about it all but hey, thats what livejournals are for. i feel as if i being stretched out like old chewing gum. i cant deal with people that try to encase my feelings and make me do things and like people and all that ( Read more... )

how do you save a dysfunctinal family? how do you prevent from having one? i think im growing up. i had a really stupid arguement my mom last nite in which i simply listened to her talk, apologized, and washed the dishes with almost no resentment. i feel jaded and cut off. Like ive lost that inner voice everyones supposed to have that tells me ( Read more... )

i hope someone answers this...my secret fear is that no one will answer and i'll look like an idiot with no friends ( Read more... )

camp creek this weekend. hell fucking yes!! i cant wait to get there and just relax. its been my away place since before my actual birth (if that makes sense). im sooo ready to GO ( Read more... )

hey kids ( Read more... )