I look at her and smile while we're ripping wallpaper down. She smiles back and says, "So do you think you could have an orgasm with another guy?"

2005 -
me - do i turn you on?
her - no

2006 -
text message to me - "just thinking about you turns me on"

the difference a year can make

PeriSoft - did I tell you about the time we were playing chess?
PeriSoft - we're playing, and as usual she's pwning me
PeriSoft - she takes like six of my pieces in a row
PeriSoft - and then yells, in the deepest voice she has, "KILLING SPREE!@!!!"

to some this will make no sense, to others its fucking hilarious.

You're like quicksand ( Read more... )

Marty wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Marty looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of ( Read more... )

Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.."

this is why i never capitalize, it makes things that much more interesting

I love chilitos or as they later became known as the chili cheese burrito and was dissapointed when almost all Taco Hells took them off the menu. However comma this is taking it a little too far.

This has got to be one of the best trailers I've ever seen.  It's too bad that its only a trailer tho. The guy had a great idea but no money so he made a trailer to get some intrest.  I hope it works.  It's a big download but I think its well worth it.

``Since I started working, every single day has been worse than the day before, so that every day you see me is the worst day of my life.''

i love office space.

Cassini entered orbit around Saturn. I've been a big fan of Saturn since I was a little kid and have always wanted to see all the little particles that make up the rings. You would think that now we have a spacecraft orbiting the planet we would see a picture like that.