It's been a while.. a Long while... Theres no time to catch up. I need to eat and then go to bed. I just know that I'm happy. I got what i wanted. I got exactly what I waited months on end for. and theres nothing in the wolrd that could make me give him up. he's all that i need.

In the song "Kim" by Eminem, theres this one part that sticks out in my mind. It goes like this.... "I hate you. I hate you. I swear to god I hate you. Oh my god I love you. How the fuck could you do this to me? How the fuck could you do this to me?" I don't know why, but it just makes me think about a billion different things ( Read more... )

I had a dream last night that I was standing on top of a bulding, about to jump, but I didn't ( Read more... )

"Welcome to the Alltel message system, please enter your mailbox number ( Read more... )

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So i like to read horoscopes... They often times prove to be right in my opinion. You just have to look a little deeper into them than what you read on the surface. Here's mine for tomorrow ( Read more... )

I'm talking to Derek Spanel. Thats fucking insane. A year ago, I wouldn't have dreamed of ever talking to him again. But I don't blame him any more. I know that he didn't break my heart on purpose. And I know that Tyler didn't either. But at the time, it was so much easier to say and think that he did. I'm selfish and was mearly thinking of my self ( Read more... )

And it's happened once again.
I'll turn to a friend,
Someone that understands,
And sees through the master plan.
But everybody's gone,
And I've been here for too long,
To face this on my own.

Blink 182 - Dammit
Damn it, I'm supposed to be better now. I was better. I swear to you I was. But I'm completly lost. I want to be happy. And I was happy, ( Read more... )

i really wish i had the balls to kill my self. i mean to do it in a sure-fire way that i'll acctually die. i'm tired of over doses... not to mention that i took all my pills in an unsucessful attempt to take my my life last month. i'm tired of being such a screw up that i can't even kill my self right. how do i manage that ( Read more... )

I've sat here for nearly ten minuts now, and i still don't know what to say. ok really what is there to say? I think I've already said everything that I possibly can say. I miss him so bad. It just gets worse and worse, and i don't want to miss him any more. I'm tired of it. It's so hard. Damn it. I just want him to hold me, and be with me. fuck ( Read more... )