Didn't think I'd be writing here again...honestly....never thought I'd be writing about this, right? Been avoiding talking about it...worried that the mists that obscured my soul would suddenly part, revealing the true vulnerability of my wretched state. Yet here I am...and it's OK....you know? I just am. in love. and the world is still there...and ( Read more... )

sorry - just in a Dr. Horrible kind of mood lately.

I'm back?

sorta kinda...I may make this my "Tony's Adventures in AZ station...who knows?

no revelations today....SSDD still.

more later though....I promise.

Tony

I am back. that's a good thing, no? I guess...I should unleash a tsunami of events, happenings and occurences in my cosmopolitan series of staggeringly powerful lifestyle appearances. (hey, at least I've gotten more succinct, right?) sigh. that's all for now...I'm a touch beat.

Tony

I won't bemoan the fact that I have'nt written for aeons....nor will I apologize for the tone of this dictate to the silence. I just wish - that I had better things to report, something shiny and faboo....with lots of prezzies and happy happy fun stuff. I just wish...that I was in a better frame of mind - a new strength lent to my holy quests and ( Read more... )

I'm lowballing it a bit...I hesitate to estimate (wow...really bad rhyme...) my "kingdom's" worth...else I sink deeper into the funk of my current existential dilemmas. This is my 1st entry in a few months...no reason other than RL getting all indignant and testy in my face, wish I could just sock it one and scream at it to leave me in peace. OMGD ( Read more... )

and here it is folks....my 2nd entry this month! huzzah. sorry, just feeling all of cynical and gloomy humbug today - tried to orchestrate a meet at my place, all was goin well - (sorta...sorta...sigh.) until it got all tense and unhappy...I won't go into the gruesome details...but the little gathering ended on a downer of blah magnitude - and I'm ( Read more... )

it's been a while since my last posting - and I am sorry that I have missed so much....but there are valid and compelling real like nastiness that has been my focus of late. Much of this unhappy situation hasn't been resolved as of yet - but I am pushing forward, albeit at a stagger pace. things that should have been resolved at this point have ( Read more... )

so here I am - less sick, more stable (financially that is...;) ) and getting my instructors and classes in order...alls I need is a new place by December and a bit of serendipity. brighter note of sorts - am seeing RAW this Monday - and have an anime convention to peek at this Saturday...as long as I keep up my assignments and my health and fair ( Read more... )

I'm not going to be maudlin today...I'm going to try not to let myself get affected by everything that happens 10 times over just because it's my birthday. I'm going to try to just let this day happen. I'm going to do my best for my own relative sanity and peace of mind...to just let things go - so no playing "Black Celebration" by Depeche Mode or ( Read more... )

I need some kind of time out from dealing with this existence...I think that I'm making changes to deal directly with the problems that I'm facing - yet they all seem to be the wrong way to do so...there IS no right way it seems. I try to be honest, forthright...honorable...I won't sacrifice integrity or self-esteem...and I try to be as ( Read more... )