Its kinda crazy. I'm sitting outside of the intensive care unit. With my family and friends of ours and my cousins. And yet I'm so alone rite now. And I just keep thinking of steven in there alone. With his loved ones only able to see him thru glass doors. Its just not fair.

God I fucked it all up.

Please let things be normal tomorrow and the day after and the day after that...

So I'm watching the OC and they're playing interpol. And I just miss him, like a lot.

So yeah. Reading all my old entries made me all nostalgic and shit and I really wish I didn't stop writing. Not just in here but just in general. As embarrassing as some of these were to go back and read, its nice to see where I was and what I was doing and feeling at that moment in time ( Read more... )

Sigh. I just want things to go back to how they were.

this is crazy. i havent posted on here in over a year. and the sad part is, nothing has changed with me. i still live with my grandparents, im going nowhere with school. im just stuck in this rut with the desire to get out but i totally lack the motivation. i was fired from target a year ago. ive been working as a nanny for most of this year ( Read more... )

happy birthday, little sister <3 <3 <3

at work a couple of weeks ago, there was only two cashiers and we were really backed up, and i saw fucking jennie garth and her daughter in my lane. so im russsshing to get to her. why does someone from the floor decide to come for backup and take her away from my lane? i was bummed out.

and happy belated birthday, by the way <3 <3 <3

god its been forever since ive updated. this month has had its ups and downs. . . alot of really good ups and one seriously big down. ive been hanging out with jeff alot lately-- the la zoo [[NO PENGUINS!!]], panera, burbank. . . THEN gina and my mother drove down for my birthday, and we had a 'sunday morning' italian dinner. my mom cooked my ( Read more... )