I love being around people who have so much life in them. It makes me want to be alive. I need people like that in my life, especially right now. I feel so dead everywhere else. I'm afraid that I can't bring life to others. That they will never taste the abundant life that Jesus provided for us on the cross from me. Out of the mouth speaks life and ( Read more... )

It is so hard to see what's inside. But what's harder are the questions that will probably go unanswered. Such as if my true heart hasn't really been seen by anyone then why are guys attracted to me but they say they are attracted to my heart. That doesn't make any sense. That means that they couldn't have been attracted to my heart they have only ( Read more... )

Emotions and feelings are so different. I've learned that in the past 7 years of being a christian most of the tears have been from emotion and not from feelings. When you are emotional it's like a pity part for yourself. How could they have hurt me so bad? I truely trusted them. Why does this have to happen to me? And it's not always negative ( Read more... )

For so many years I've little by little been putting up walls to shield myself from others hurting me. Before the walls were put up, whenever anyone would say something or do something hurtful I would feel a physical ache in my heart. That physical ache would trigger emotion and tears which would then worsen the hurtful feeling. It's so amazing how ( Read more... )

I learned so much today. My talk with Walter was great, I learned so much about myself that I really needed to learn. I shocked and scared myself though, with finding out that for the past going on 20 years of my life I have never let myself feel love. Amazing isn't it? Sound unreal? Well lemme tell you and this may hurt some but it's a really good ( Read more... )

Right now I am in the process of learning to hear from God. It's so hard sometimes so I bought a book to guide me along my journey. It's pretty good and for those of you who know me know very well that I don't like to read. So far God has taught me that hearing Him is a result of being His child and obeying His teaching, sum up of John 8:31. So ( Read more... )