I could start this entry talking about how archaic livejournal is, or I could just move on and start this entry. I won't bother playing catch up with my life, either. I was lying in bed reflecting a moment ago and I couldn't think of where else to put this down. But I wanted to put it down.

I'm thinking about Baltimore. I sort of feel like I'm being ( Read more... )

I think I should just try and write this down. I don't want to, but I should I guess. So I'll go quickly. I had this dream ( Read more... )

Alright, so I'm stumped.

Thursday night, I'm at this club downtown for my friend Britain's 21st, with a bunch of friends from school, right? I'm not there five minutes - sitting there, drinking a beer, no outward intention of meeting anyone - before this tall, gorgeous brunette and her friend emerge out of the darkness and ask if they can sit ( Read more... )

telling yourself the story of your own life as it unfolds

Here's a fleeting thought I just had in the shower: My father is the only man I've ever felt comfortable taking shit from.

I don't know if that's actually true, because I never really listened to him either. I'd like to say I always respected him, but I didn't always respect him, either. Now, though - or at least for that fleeting moment in the ( Read more... )

I'm in one of those fuck it all kind of moods. What the hell. Where's the dopamine? I'm not getting any.

I'm really tired of being lonely, and loveless, and feeling ugly. I guess what I feel mostly is fear. I'm afraid of being alone. I'm afraid of never loving again -- and if I do, of never trusting it. I suppose I just miss being able to let my guard down. I miss comfort. I miss having someone to adore.

Regrets:
Disposable Razors purchased at Family Dollar.

Blunders:
Fumbled my cell phone into a bowl filled with milk and cereal  - the purchase of which was, in itself, a blunder. (Publix brand knock-off Reese's Puffs called "PB & Cocoa")

Reflection:
My development has been the gradual shortening in duration of my periods of failure.

New Favorite Old ( Read more... )

After actually using math to work out how much money I have, instead of wishful thinking, it turns out that all the money I have for the next two weeks is only 5 dollars more than the gate ticket price for Bear Creek Festival. So I'm like 50-100 bucks short. How does one acquire this money in a short period of time? Justin isn't paying me until ( Read more... )

Oh all the things I could do if I would just do those things. I'm jittery, it's 3 AM. I took my Focalin too late I guess. There isn't any food in the apartment, except for spaghetti, some cans of Campbell's soup (echhhkk), two cans of chili, peanut butter and jelly, some veggie burgers, papaya yogurt (really, papaya?), Publix brand Crispix, Milk, ( Read more... )