Dear World:

Please get out of my relationship before I crack under the pressure and break up with the poor boy. I love him, but contrary to popular belief, One Month is not enough time to make decisions about forever.

Thank you,
Deva

Taking a deep breath and releasing every nonessential thing... how have I never listened to the lyrics of this song before? I feel righteous envy wishing I had written it.

I find myself longing for something... longing deeply. And ready to let the wind take me away to some other beautiful place. Ready to miss whom I will miss and let the past lie quietly. Ready to fall in love again as soon as love is ready to be fallen into.

In case you're wondering, I still miss you.

Love,
Deva

I look at people's engagement photos on facebook and the like. SO adorable. I love how happy they are to be together, but the truth is I find it hard to imagine ever feeling that way about someone. Not just "I find it hard to imagine ever feeling that way about Gary". I mean about anyone. I used to be able to imagine it clearly, but only ever with ( Read more... )

To find oneself pleading for a coronary amputation...

Sometimes I say things that I mean but don't mean to say. Mostly happy deeply heartfelt things.
Sometimes I leave empty tupperware in the fridge because I'm not ready to wash it yet.
Sometimes my heart wells up and flows right out my mouth, but normally right out my pen.

Today is one of those days.

Serendipitously crossed paths with a very nice man today. Someone fluent in Spanish who plays the piano and is studying music therapy. Beautiful. We grocery shopped together and laughed and had an all around good time. And then we parted ways he to the salt and I to the produce, and he didn't get my number. Of course I'll probably never see him ( Read more... )

LiveJournal ( Read more... )

ha. I just realized that basically since 2009. This live journal has been naught but an outlet for lonely emotions. If I'm feeling lonely, it's likely because I have no one to talk to or no one who understands. Those sorts of thoughts and feelings have no place in my actual blog which is written for the benefit of others, and I hardly want them in ( Read more... )