Writing letters, only to keep them in my head ( Read more... )

I don't even know if I'm lying to myself... but I know how I feel. And I hate you. You make me hate myself. Enjoy, I hope you forget everything, you don't deserve the memories I can't erase myself. I know this isn't me really speaking, and you're right, it's what you've done to me that's speaking. Job well done.

So April finally sprung its way through the damn cold. And now I'm almost twenty-one even though I've felt 21 for years already. I don't know why I woke up today with no plans or anything to do but school work, on easter morning, but it's beautiful outside, which makes it easier to spend these days alone.
Lately things haven't been so difficult. ( Read more... )

My heart can take no more... I'm in shreds, on the floor ( Read more... )

Never knew I could feel like this ( Read more... )

I've found it. A reason to die trying. Nothing. I don't have a heart to give anyone. It's been taken from me, I've had my fun, I have had something that I'll never give up wanting. But I can't have it. I want to fight to the death, I want to die for what I want. I want to bleed for it. But she has my blood, and my strength to fight. I know I ( Read more... )

There are no words that I can use to describe the many feelings and emotions that keep circling through my head. I only stumble when I find the word true love, but in fact it may be useless to use since I will never know until I've lived my whole life. Though, at this moment, it's what I use to describe these things that run through my body like ( Read more... )

I'm blind. I'm Selfish--self-consumed. I'm not alone in this pain, yet I keep acting like it. I hate when I'm weak. I'm sorry.

With the new year, of course, comes new expectations. But this year I'm not going to make any new expectations for myself, or even others. Instead I'm going to resurrect all the died and dying resolutions I've made in the past, the ones I've poorly or never completed. A whole year has gone by in a blur, and I've lost a great deal. So instead ( Read more... )

Parts of me feel like they're dying. I can't get rid of this awful feeling in my stomache. And at the same time I feel that this is a change for the best. I just don't want the good part of me to die. I can't let it. So many memories, so much pain, I can't even look to them to help me, but they'll never leave me, they'll never stop haunting me.
I ( Read more... )