Hey ya'll I have a new journal it is boi_of_despair if you want to add me go ahead but leave me a message so i know who you are.

Hey i jsut wanted to let ya'll know i am ok and just got home from the hospital, i am doing well, Ryan and I patched things up hopefully, I now know he still cares, and that is all that matters, but i have a new journal which i shall begin to write in, tell all my feelings for myself and only myself, if you would like to knwo just give me your e- ( Read more... )

i Have decided to start a new journal, i am still wondering if i should tell ya'll the name, or not, or if i should even continue to post here.

I told ryan i was going to kill myself and i truly was by taking ten oxycontins, then as much as i hope it would stop him from being hurt by my foolishness anymore, then i realized that it would hurt him more if i did, so i decided not to, but now i have no reason to not to, ryan hates me again, he has once again ignored me on his AIM so now i know ( Read more... )

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So yesterday started off tiring enough, I woke up on Ivan's couch around five in the morning, left there and came home, in just enough time to write my mom a note asking to go out and stay the night, which i gave her right befroe i fell asleep, well i woke back up around 9, and showerd then went to Ryan's, I got there around 10:45, he was still ( Read more... )

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As Aaron entered the room of Mrs. Marilyn McGill, on this early Saturday morning in February, he was greeted my many of his fellow debaters. While Sarah was organizing the concessions and Chris searching for the extemp topics, Aaron simply set down the food he brought and told them he was going ahead to the cafeteria to join the rest of the team ( Read more... )

A while ago Ryan wrote a short story about how he see him and i meeting, it was from my point of view, i too have decided to write one from my point of view, the truth and just that, as a write it i will cut it apart into different parts, and afterwards i may write one from his point of view but that has yet to be decided.

I am so god damned depressed right now and i don't know why, I was at this party this weekend with ryan and all of those feelings which i thought i were over just came flooding back, and now i am left alone without anyone, I need a really hot boy friend bad, I know it is bad to say a really hot boy friend because looks aren't everything right? ( Read more... )