hm well depression comes and goes these days. *sigh* I am getting old, I need to find a good boyfriend. Anywho's I have to work on my car this break and find a full to part time job. I'm trying to get back to working on some stories I started but me and writing are two things that have always clashed, or rather sitting down on working on them. I ( Read more... )

to really believe my life just isn't worth living anymore. No one I love can honestly stand me, and no one has ever really loved me and meant it nor continue being able to deal with me.

than having your bestfriend's man come on to you while waiting for her to get out of work........ awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwkkkkkkkkkwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaard. Especially when they're your friend too, but you have no intention of starting that shit. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu------------. No thank you. For one, been through that already when I actually liked the ( Read more... )

whole bunch of stuff happened, and now I'm sick. Family is down money because I lost my glasses. ugh why must things end up a catastrophe sometimes. Oh well, definitely enjoying down time, that is when I can

it hurts more everyday, I wish he had never said anything, because I had finally started to forget and let go. I had to end it once and for all. He never loved me, and said he never would give me that love. I haven't felt this hurt in such a long time. I'm not sure if this is a mountain I can really get over anymore. Even others question me on it, ( Read more... )

So life has been weird, filled with ups and downs. I've been meeting new people but for most of the summer taking it easy. On wednesday I'm to meet Nao-kun and hang out for a while. I'm sort of nervous, I've never hung out with a japanese guy before, girls-a few times, guys almost never. What should we do?

as you can see journal neither a relationship or friendship was possible with that guy. Nothing I ever did was 'good' in his eyes and he constantly told me nothing was ever his fault- it was always mine and I treated him like crap. Last time I checked it took two people for a relationship/friendship to fail- so I was tired of hearing it. I told him ( Read more... )

"The worst pain for a female is when she smiles, just to keep the tears from falling, and sleeps, just so she doesn't ..."

Exactly how I'm feeling now Aniichan

Another failure...... maybe I should just go back to that guy who pretty much used me, that seems to be the best I can even do anymore. Everyone I actually have feelings for just plays with my heart and when they're done leave it in pieces.

to compliment amazes and astounds me.........you couldn't even say one could you