god i am so in the mood to b/p right this second..Damnit i need to so badly. I didnt all day. Im having the electrolyte imbalnce and shit.. i think.. The left side of my chest is killing me. The back side and around the arm pit area. I always strain muscles around there from purging. I talked to kristin 2day she told me to write when i wanna binge ( Read more... )

Im not doing well at all. I beleive im going to die to be honest. Im binging and purging 3 times a day. Last night i needed to work out and i did right after i purged..well about an hour after, it was great purge.Everything was in the bag. it was so heavy, i loved it. I did, i know not good. SO i went to the bleachers and jus ran/walked up the ( Read more... )

So this weekend was horrible. I was triggered , probaly because i Text Cira on friday to have a good trip (2x), she never responded. Im sure there was more to this, probaly having no weekend plans and such. SO i binged and purged all weekend., Yah i relapzed completly. I lost control. I remember saturday was jus awful, i woke up binged purged.. ( Read more... )

It seems like everyone is getting better, and im just gettin worse. I binged alot tonight, and ofcourse the purging came along with that. We all know that it doesnt get up everything though. SO after my first purge, i waited an hour went to the park and jogged 2 miles. I was scared to make my body do any hard work,Ha,like it didnt? lol./Then came ( Read more... )

I think the worst thing i do to myself is allow people in my life who keep hurting me, and continuing to take them back. I think thats worsee then vomiting. DAMNIT thats what causes me to vomit. I just binged again im gunna take a lax and then go to bed, wake up early to work out.. CUS ima dumb fat bitch who fucked up today.>EVERYONE say it..DUMB ( Read more... )

Ok i feel better now ( Read more... )

Im crying ( Read more... )

im sick of feeling this way. Just sick of it. Feeling like im useless.Allowing people in my life who hurt me, and continuing to allow people treat me like shit. Wanting to end my whole life because i allowed someone to treat me like shit. Its my fault, it is,.Its like an addiction , i keep taking people back. Like my eating disorder. i think alot ( Read more... )

Im triggering very badly right now. I feel like shit. Its almost 3 am and im about to start my homework. I just woke up, i took some nyquil around 7 so i cud sleep cus i felt like shit.My heart burn is so bad, my doctor says its my esophogus repairing itself.Im very upset about what happen with me and Cira last night. She wanted to see me 2night ( Read more... )

So today was a pretty good day,ill start with yesterday. YEsterday was awful, my boss at work wanted me to take on all these responsiblities that i just wasnt able to take on, and i was so confused and i just didnt know what the fuck i was going to do. I didnt eat anything all day yesterday but a bagel, and tea, so at 530 i started shaking in my ( Read more... )