summer isn't even close to the way it was just a year before.  I thought i'd mind. but i honestly dont.  i spend all my free time with sean, and i spend alot of time with my sister too.  but every minute i spend with sean is another minute farther from the life i had and the way i was, and a minute closer to what i am becoming.   i guess it really ( Read more... )

I must be stupid. I must be as stupid as i fucking look. I am easy to manipulate and easy to control. I take commands the second they are given. Im too nice. I am easily used. which explains the past three years of my life.  I want to be able to say no becuase thats something i cannot do...ever.  I want everything under control. but things are ( Read more... )

ashes are the smallest bit of what we have

so burn everything to consume the space

i want to make sure you have enough room to breath

i want you to have the sweetest dreams

I have this feeling Im losing you to them

im just some sort of replacement

something you take care of when your bored

and then your done but you'll eventually come back for more

please ( Read more... )

I'VE NEVER BEEN MORE IN LOVE. <3 S.H.

fuck you mom and dad. you make my life a living hell sometimes. I dont know what you want from me or carly or from eachother but i hope you decide soon because i cant stand living in this fucking house with you two. you make me sick. but i guess i make you just as unwell. its not fair. nothings fair ( Read more... )

Gone With The Swell ( Read more... )

So having a "blog" couldnt possibly sound any fucking gayer then it already does. but for some reason i love this shit. this writing in an online journal in which is available for anyone to read and comment on. But to me it matters no more and no less when a stranger makes a comment or a close friend makes one. we are all the same shitty people. ( Read more... )

WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO DO!>?!?>#>!?@$?!>!?#??????

HSPA'S today. fuck them. i hate school. i say the same shit everyday. im just here to fucking complain. no wonder i have no real friends. no one wants to hear me bitch non stop. im bored as fuck. i need a job. i might go back to bella terra. i aplied to a few places but everyone is like not hiring until the spring. my mom doesnt want me going back ( Read more... )

i have nothing. i have no one. i am no one. i have no life. my life is over. i wish i could fix this mess. i miss her. and i miss him. and i miss all of those things i was doing. i miss parties. and i miss friends. and i miss freedom. i have nothing left. i dont feel bad for me, dont feel bad for me. i am so lonely, i am so fucking lonely. i've ( Read more... )