Well today was an okay day. I just feel like at times, I can't please a darn soul here with my mom. I mean, think about it. Every single day, she's griping about something, about ME. I mean, maybe Aaron is right. Maybe he has been right all along. I DON'T KNOW. What I do know is if I don't figure out my life, I'm going to be a nobody. At times I ( Read more... )

Well, I think Saturday night was probably one the most important nights of my life. What started out as a night of fun with friends, ended up as a nightmare with me in the hospital clinging to life for a few hours. We ended up going to this bar and once I started drinking forget it. Of course now I question as to whether they are really friends ( Read more... )

http://www.angelfire.com/ri/edsm/ci.htmlRead more... )

Well, I haven't written in a really long time. I guess I had a lot of resentment towards my best friend in California. And I hope that one day he will have enough grace to forgive me; for the terrible things I've thought, said, and written. We used to be so close; of course that was the time I had God in my life. So much has gone downhill since ( Read more... )

Life has been so crazy lately. Moving into a new house, yet trying to keep in touch with all my old friends. Hence, why this brings me to this right now. I was glancing through at my (best) friend Aaron, and suprisingly, I'm still listed as his best friend. But when we talk, it's like things are so different between us. I don't know. I miss him. I ( Read more... )

TODAY WAS INTERESTING. WENT TO THE GYM. TALKED TO AARON LAST NIGHT. DON'T KNOW WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN BETWEEN US. WE'VE DRIFTED SO FAR APART AND THERE SEEMS TO BE SOME KIND OF WALL. WHO KNOWS. WORK SUCKS. MORE LATER. I MISS MY BABY.

one question. why am i alone? i have nobody to talk to. maybe i will die before i'm old. that'd be great. then i wouldn't be a useless piece of crap, or a stupid whore, as my dad puts it. i lose out on things, i'm dumb, stupid, fat. maybe if i was a decent person, my parents wouldn't have gotten divorced, maybe i wouldn't have cut my wrists, maybe ( Read more... )

WELL, I BOUGHT MY MOM A BOOK AND THE MOVIE THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST FOR HER BIRTHDAY. SHE REALLY LIKED IT. MY BIRTHDAY IS IN LESS THAN A MONTH. I'M JUST GETTING MY CLOSEST AND BEST FRIENDS AND WE'RE GOING TO WINDSOR, TO DRINK, GAMBLE, AND GO CLUBBIN. IT WILL BE SUCH A BLAST.

When we talk ( Read more... )

EVERYTIME ( Read more... )