Reading myself is so weird.. it feels as if it was some total stranger. I don't write like me, if that is plausible. Phuuu, I won't even try to enumerate all the things that happened since last time. Now I just felt like posting even if I have nothing to say or rather I'm not in the mood for gathering my thoughts and say something that makes sense ( Read more... )

I don't know where I am, where I should be, what I should do, what I should like. I don't know if thinking does any good for me. I'm more lost than ever, though I understand now that things can't be the way I'd liked them to be. Does this make it any better I wonder...
I'll be back after some more thinking.

Tomorrow will hurt. How much I wonder. (and I hope just physically... but that doesn't have to be too much either... somehow I feel retarded..? :X ( Read more... )

I've accepted. (At least for now. There can come a 'trigger' any minute that changes everything again.) Weird, that the superficial (in need of a more suitable word...)side of me always 'helps' a lot in these cases.

Or would it be better not being like that and still going on? I wonder. (Well, the icon certainly isn't that of utter surrender..XD)

It's over, I can hardly believe I won't have to be studying all day from now on. I'm already missing it^^(嘘よ ( Read more... )

What's gonna happen when it ends? (Why am I asking such lame questions? Ah, this one tooXD ( Read more... )

Falling asleep while studying is not the best way of studying.

Yay! And I'm losing my mind, as usual.

Matteiru..?

I'm beginning to think the only reason fate exists is to screw everything up for me. Why must it be a test of how much I can endure. Nothing good lasts long, that's for sure. But I need more than moments (and even then fearing that it'll soon has to be over... because it has to, always)

Alright, fuck you. Ah sorry, that's what you've already been

I want to have a good dream tonight! It's been so long since I had a reaally nice dream (so long I don't even remember what it was)^_ ( Read more... )