ho hum ( Read more... )

So, apparently my mother is engaged. As a little more time passes between the news and the initial shock, I'm more and more used to and accepting of it. It just felt like...last night, ugh. It really sucked. Like I hear she has a new boyfriend earlier this week, then she comes to take me to thanksgiving dinner and informs me that she's ENGAGED, ( Read more... )

Once upon a time I was just like you, I did everything I said I'd do. I was dependable and faithful, I tried to be my best. I told the truth, was straight with the law, kind of tried in school and stayed below the radar oh so well. I was generically acceptable, I was everything they wanted me to be ( Read more... )

I feel I have come to a certainty:
the masochism is pleasure,
the lies are at my leisure,
the pain simply a measure
of me buckling under pressure.

<333 ( Read more... )

And so what if I'm being selfish, instead of for once being selfless? So what if I know what I truly believe, and I know the sacrifice will never be worth the cost? Is it wrong that I don't care how you feel, that I can only see myself in all of this, because I finally see the reality ( Read more... )

I'm really just ready to say fuck this shit. I feel like I have to fight my way into this group of people because this dumb bitch doesn't like me because she thinks I'm trying to take away "her" [not] guy. First of all, he's not fucking hers, they're not fucking together. Second of all, I have absolutely NO interest in Eric anymore, it was a one- ( Read more... )

i feel heavy and depressed, like nothing is ok. i feel like i've let myself down and overworked myself and like i've been up for a million years. i feel alone, i feel used, i feel empty i feel hollow. i feel angry, tired, stupid, useless. like the slacker kevin says i am. i want to be anywhere but here, anyone but me. it's sad that one freakin' ( Read more... )

It was so weird to hang out in Wheeling again, because it was kind of like a part of my life I left behind. When I first moved out of Wheeling, I was miserable. I hung out with my old wheeling crew all the time, all the boys that I loved and adored and we'd play football and do drugs and all those other silly things that boys like to do. Then all ( Read more... )

mm, shroomed with heather today, and got babysat by kevin. we ruined his room x1000, attacked each other a lot and heather flailed like a sperm. it was beautiful. the sound of my trip was kevin going "dundadun" in a retard voice, it was like that sound they make in cartoons when someone says something uber-stupid. hahaha. i really shouldn't be ( Read more... )

I love Brad? Dan. Brad. No...Dan. Definently Dan. Drigo? No. Dan....Dan or Brad. Definently Brad. OK maybe Drigo a lil. But Brad. No, I love Dan, Dan's been there forever. Brad...Mmmm, Brad.

...fuck this shit. No guys for a while, I need to get my head on straight and figure out my priorities.

--Anya--