im painting on a toilet seat. and i accidentally just ate some paint. it was kinda sweet and not an unpleasant taste at all. when i finally went to wash out my mouth i had a red dot on my tongue. you could say the flavor lingers.

and i might just be the slowest kid to use a drill.

today was super super super. and ill tell you why, yes i will. i aced my art history test, or so i think, and i got my Goya paper back (A, meaning my infatuation was genuine!!) and then i had a fabulous day with the Hoffer. we decided to go to the zoo at central park, and im all about zoos. on the way there, this dude was like, "do you want to ( Read more... )

its been ages, chaps, merely ages. cant decide where to start. we'll start with fun. yesterday i made another drunken debut (cant be a debut if its another, but whatever) on the streets of new york. saw carey shields perform for an intimate crowd of mainly teeny bopper girls. and like 2 ladies who could actually buy something other than a ( Read more... )

i havent seen the kid in 10 months and she's suddenly chasing me around the house and calling me daddy. i aint yo daddy, biatch. funny cuz she likes abuse but especially being beaten with pillows. i like sleeping and cleaning my room. strange combo if you ask me. i wonder if im responsible enough to turn in this application and do a junior ( Read more... )

i never thought id say this, but i think MUSTARD IS MORE VERSATILE THAN KETCHUP.

its all starting to come together. the way everything i own happens to match my new plaid pajamas. i was home for the weekend and i found myself searching through old files in the basement in the wee hours of the morning. my mom saves everything; report cards, drawings, merit awards. among those things was a 4th grade scrapbook put together by ( Read more... )

lately it seems like anyone who grows up in worcester will eventually be a jerry springer guest.

5am- i clean the lint trap out of ALL the dryers in sterns basement. then i force ilana in her ghetto sock- ragged hair to get in the rolling laundry basket so i can spin her around. then i left her in the middle of the room but she managed to climb out on her own. dammit carl ( Read more... )

ANOTHER NIGHT IM TOO ANXIOUS TO SLEEP. STUPID SCHOOL. OR MAYBE I CANT SLEEP CUZ I SLEPT TIL 2PM TODAY. BUT I SAW THE AYL AND WE HAD SOME NON PRODUCTIVE SHOPPING FUN. WHICH IS THE ONLY TYPE OF SHOPPING FUN WE EVER HAVE. ESPECIALLY IN THIS DUMB TOWN WHERE ALL THE STORES ARE TOO BIG AND OVERWHELMING TO ACTUALLY SEE INDIVIDUAL OBJECTS. CROWDS ARE ( Read more... )

the girls to my left have a full length mirror face down on a plastic sheet. they are banging the hell out of it with hammers. and wearing protective goggles. the noise is pretty distracting. they wear intense looks of concentration on their faces ( Read more... )