All of my self-help books have told me that I should go out and spoil myself. So yesterday I dropped a month's rent on clothes and bathing suits. I have to admit, it take make me feel better!

I have been at my parents for a couple days now, just relaxing and hanging out with my dad. He took me shopping today and we spent more money on gifts for the ( Read more... )

I'm almost afraid to go to sleep at night for fear that I miss the next part of Britney's breakdown. It's actually quite comforting to watch because I thought that I was having a breakdown, but so far I still have my hair.

I haven't updated in a few days and I'm not really into doing it right now either, but I'll give a brief overview. The past couple of days have been really difficult for me. I've been really emotional, having a hard time concentrating on school, and basically going out of my mind. So yesterday it kind of came to a breaking point and Kris and I ( Read more... )

I feel like throwing up.

Today could definitely be the worst Valentine's day ever. I am so confused about everything, including myself. I don't know whether I want Kris to come to Cuba and he doesn't know if he should come either. This is supposed to be the day that make jokes about it being a Hallmark holiday and snub it together, but instead I don't know where he is and ( Read more... )

Today was my first attempt at limiting contact with Kris. Every book I've read says that the only way to get over someone is to have no contact with them for 60 days. I think that's a little ridiculous because some former couples actually want to remain friends and not having contact with them for that long might just challenge any hope of a ( Read more... )

Today has been a horrid, horrid day that ended up with me feeling good. I don't want to dwell on the bad stuff, so here is a quick point form shit I dealt with:

• Found out that after our conversation on Sunday Kris spent the day getting high with Erin at her house, where she is roommates with Niki, whose Mom is visiting. How nice. Also found out ( Read more... )

It turns out that yesterday after Kris told me he appreciated everything I said, went to his brother's house and spent the better part of the evening getting high with his roommate Erin. I have completely lost him now, and I don't know how to let go. I am so full of rage and hurt and I just don't know what to do. The Kris I knew was not this person ( Read more... )

I really wasn't going to post anything today because I really didn't feel like being honest, especially now that I know other people have this address. Maybe that was a mistake giving it out, but it's been done. Yesterday I didn't get too much done in terms of school work, but I set up my new printer and cleaned up for awhile, had some good talks ( Read more... )

I guess I knew this moment would come back to me again. I knew that I couldn't be that happy for too long. I want to call him just to hear his voice and tell him that I miss him and just try and convince him to try and make it work one more time. But I know that I can't do this and I'm trying so hard to just hold back the tears and hope this moment ( Read more... )