it's been a tumultuous week.

i went with krysten to mr. smith's funeral. kyle's speech was beautiful. he and his mom walked into the sanctuary and immediately she started crying. during the whole ceremony, she listlessly rested her pretty blond head on his shoulder. when it was time for him to get up to speak, he stood up and calmly took off his ( Read more... )

kyle's dad, kirk died on saturday at noon. he was only 53. he developed lung cancer a little less than a year after kyle and i broke up. he's been a smoker for years and continued smoking until he had a seizure a couple of weeks ago. the tumors in his lung were responding to radiation treatment, kyle told me at chad's party earlier this summer. ( Read more... )

i walk into the garage with an armful of yoplait fruit yogurt containers that i've been sent to put in the outside refrigerator. i shut the door, sealing off the air-conditioned house from the oven-like garage, and take this lone moment of privacy to cry for the first time today ( Read more... )

i saw this quote somewhere today ( Read more... )

[shelby and ray's apartment, houston, texas]

i am now in houston. last week, i was in NYC and stayed in south orange with kelly i absolutely love that girl and was glad israel brought us together. we talked about 9-5s, clothes, hezbollah, sex, parents. i met this 40-year-old writer at the conference who is indian and looks about 23. he works at ( Read more... )

[my room, plano]

i should be getting ready for work, but i'm so tired...that is the dominating feeling of the summer. i found some of the other ap interns on facebook and we started talking yesterday. i also sliced open my thumb with a metal rib in ceramics. i'm currently making a piggy bank for damien--in the shape of a sperm. a sperm bank. we' ( Read more... )

[ravi's room]

i stayed with damien this weekend. it was bliss and wonderful, but when i got there on friday night it was weird at first because it was as though i'd forgotten him ( Read more... )

i would like to be shown off ( Read more... )

"if you're going to complain and be bitter about having to drive down for your birthday than i'd rather you not come."
-an anonymous boyfriend

now that's love ( Read more... )

i spent last night in the hospital, sleeping on the empty bed in my mom's private room. it's so painful to see her so frail and sickly but at the same time it feels really good to finally be of service to her. i didn't sleep--at all. i'd maybe doze off for an hour and then have to wake up to help her cough or go to the bathroom. it' hard for her to ( Read more... )