WANTED:

A nice, dorky Jewish girl, preferrably in the 16-20 yr. old age range.

Tasks needed to be performed:
Cuddling, being awesome, thinking I'm funny (I have even worse self-esteem than the average guy), actually being funny yourself (and not "girl funny"...some of you guys might get that.), cuddling, being adorable, adding even more quirkiness ( Read more... )

What's the deal, yo ( Read more... )

Dear Dumb Bitch Whose Locker is Next To Mine ( Read more... )

It might not look like it, but I've actually lost weight like crazy lately. In less than two weeks since I started my "No Pepsi/Hour of Cardio Daily" plan, I'm already down a pants size, and XL shirts are becoming really loose on me. (That makes me sound so damn fat ( Read more... )

Matt Hughes is going to kill Royce Gracie. That is all.

I actually heard someone saying this while walking by me, and since I heard it completely out of context, it makes it 100 times funnier:

"You have to be sexy in order to throw."

Whoever named this business, located in Illinois, deserves a tremendous blowjob. That is all.

To you young'uns who read this ( Read more... )

To explain the post below this: my Sweet Angel, sweeter than all the sweetness in the universe with a halo that shines brighter than all of the stars in the night's sky, is not mine, unfortunately. It was partially my shyness doing me in, but my young friend Isaac didn't help matters out, and in fact, destroyed matters in many cases. Oh well, it's ( Read more... )

I got fucked over this weekend. That is all.