i didn't quite suspect to return to this livejournal, but at this early silent hour i feel particularly lonely and pensive. i suppose there is a paper and pen waiting for me at the end of my bed-- which has been very useful in times of overwhelming, yet mostly fleeting, emotion. tonight that won't do. partially because i am feeling as though i want ( Read more... )

i am about to ride my bike to someplace far. motion is my meaning. i have been glued to reading and re-reading the words we exchange. the nervousness tempts me to write everything i can't write to him. the risk of coming across foolish is present. i'm not sure how to pick you up and bring you in. i'm not sure how to untangle your fingers and re- ( Read more... )

calculated precisely--i have had 2 & 1/2 hours worth of sleep in the last 52!

e.c.--i simply adore you, & someday will make you mine.

i sat on jacks knee impatiently as though i was still six years old and waiting for the church sermon to be finished. as i tried wiggling free he held tightly to my shirt & pulled me back, assuring me that i was safe. i bit my lip & he moved my hands across the vinyl, pushing the needle forward. he introduced me to all the buttons & levers, showing ( Read more... )

do you want to hear the tales of how i became sober? are you aching to find out who i got a venereal disease from last weekend? how about getting in on what new "hawt" music i just downloaded to my ipod ( Read more... )

the sickness has been shaken and i'm ready to head back out in to the streets. luckily i am just in time for the weekend. here is the catch! i am sobering up, you know, laying off the smack that gave me this 3 day hang over. there are crazy loop holes everywhere when it comes to my schemes, so here it is: i am staying sober for as long as dawn can ( Read more... )

what have i done to receive such a severe punishment? i just expelled pink french toast tasting mouth excrement for the tenth time tonight. when the time comes to sit up --although it is seldom-- i feel the uncontrollable urge to pass out or to take a gun to my tightly spinning skull ( Read more... )

feeling like self actualized oregon trail pixels. i had to be driven home...to recover. i have discovered a break through- you can actually party much too hard- to the point of it ripping your chest right through the rib cage. i had a lot of fun while it lasted. hopefully once this is over i can still venture out, especially when it isn't so ( Read more... )

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hearts pounded as we shared our first kiss. i felt yours beat deeply into my chest & as i took a moment to admire you, pressing down on to me, the words 'the milk from your breast is on my lips' floated through the air over our heads. your smile was inviting and my pants were dripping from a towel rack after that walk in the rain. we've come so ( Read more... )