i wanted to appologize for my last entry, but i just can't. I know that what i said is true, and i know that most of you probably know it's true too. Any problem that we write about in here is miniscule compared to death, to the loss of a friend or acquantance. I really miss my friend, and all i have left to hold onto are 3 vivid memories, and 2 ( Read more... )

Fuck you guys, all of you. I'm sitting here, reading all of your journal entries about feeling left out, about needing something to fulfill your life, about missing a friend or two. But yesterday, a kid died across town! Someone DIED!!! and all everyone can do is go on with their normal lives, still thinking about themselves. It's always about ( Read more... )

I'm at a point in time where many things are becoming clear to me. Whether i now understand them the right way is a totally different issue, but i'm regretting how i've lived and how i've thought. I have let people use me, and i've made promises i shouldn't have made. and for that i'm sorry. Some people don't deserve what i've promised them, ( Read more... )

Happy Birthday Jared, my love...

He's 33 today, December 26th...

I love him so much...may this whole day be dedicated solely to him

I love you

It's funny how even having a livejournal has become a trend...

What can i say, guys? Life is falling back into the routine depressed emoness. I have so much to say...so much anger, pain, and hate inside of me. And i want it out. It's so hard dealing with this stuff...especially when the few people who didn't know any of it decided to get ljs and read about my life. honestly guys, if i had wanted you to ( Read more... )

It's sad, you know. I have so many emotions circling inside of me, but i can't put what i want to say into words.. I was talking to my friend today, and at random moments, i would begin feeling angry or really happy, etc...but only for a moment. I feel so lost. I want to invent a person who will appear whenever i need him. he will be beautiful ( Read more... )

It's funny how i have nothing interesting to say when i'm not emo. I've stopped having all those strong emotions, and when i read other peoples LJ's, they seem so ridiculous. How can anyone be so unhappy when i've had the best 3 weeks of my life? I know, i know, when he decides he hates me, i'll fall back into that. But, how can i explain that ( Read more... )

I even like just thinking about him, and what we've done lately. I was with him on Friday, Saturday, Monday, and Tuesday. I haven't even seen my parents that much over the last week. I love this.

He's everything i've ever wanted there to be in a guy i like. He's so great and nice and...i don't know. I'm just so happy when i'm with him, and so normal when i'm not with him ( Read more... )