....and all I want to do is look at you and know I'm ok. 
mmm some something corporate.

yeah.
so today has not been fun.
it started with last night.
I realized everyone in my house had someone over except me.
like someone to fall asleep and cuddle with.
except me.
so I was like sweet.
I'm going to sleep.
and I did.
had to take a freezing cold shower (because ( Read more... )

 I had my first bad night in a while last night.
emoness.
romance and chivalry are dead in my generation.
I'll never meet someone like my dad.
cause guys like him don't exist anymore.
I don't know how to not care.
I don't even know if I have it in me to not care.
all I know is I don't want to be hurt anymore. 
and I don't want to cry anymore.

just call it ( Read more... )

I've realized:
I just don't have it in me to play games anymore.
or more importantly to deal with games played by others.
you're either legit or you're not.
end of story.
no dancing around things.
and then crawling back.
not dealing with it.
end of story.
no shadiness.
no questionable behavior.
no games.
end of story.
you want to be with me or you don't.
end of ( Read more... )

There are really only 2 things in my life that are bothering me:
- The Weather
- People who don't know their boundaries or common courtesy,

Other than that, everythings legit.

But:
The Weather: it can't make up its mind. ITS COLD. COLD AS A MOFO. and it's been that way for a while. and one day it'll get my hopes up by reaching 30, and then plunge RIGHT ( Read more... )

So,
since I don't have a boyfriend or a date really,
I've decided that I'm going to focus on what and who I love.
What valentine's day should be really about.

I LOVE:
my family. I wouldn't be anything without them
my sister, my mom, my dad, my cousin my grandparents EVERYONE.
Carly. there are so many things I can't put into words about how awesome she is.
( Read more... )

So...

I didn't do a good job with the last bulletin.
maybe it's too bold of a statement 
and too outlandish of a goal.
I mean nobody wants to be all alone right?

So.
revision to previous bulletin.
be smart.
be very smart.
and no setting myself in bad situations.

be smart.
not dumb. 

 ...with myself.
no kissing, cuddling, or anything of the sort until I graduate college.

I've had enough of stupid games and even more ridiculously stupid people.

so thats it.
NOTHING.
until I'm done with school.
that's it.

I hope I can be strong enough to do it.
because this whole dating thing is over-rated.
and I am so jaded.

the good is still going.
which feels really ridiculously good.
and its gonna keep going. 
which is even better.

I get lonely from time to time.
and thats ok.
but I'm still doing great.

the goodness continues.
and that makes me happy.

p.s. sarah deiner I think you got me sick.
trouble maker.

COUNTDOWN: 60 DAYS UNTIL JUSTINE IS 21.

I am getting better.
and it feels really good.
and it will stay this way.

I've worked out for the past 3 mornings (I'm giving myself a break tomorrow because its Friday and I would like to sleep in.)
I like school again.
I'm accomplishing things in my free time instead of just watching movies.
and I'm never late to anything anymore.
that ones the most ( Read more... )