Hell night

[jacrenparensti]

I freaked out last night. I don't know why, I just did. I had two or three panic attacks within the span of a couple hours. It threw me off. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I still don't feel right. All I know is AJ is upset cause he was already off kilter and then I threw that in. I should have been able to be stronger for her. I'm doing

Comments

[millisande]

Baby,

I am not upset with you. I wasn't even upset with you last night when it was happening. I just... I had no capacity to cope with the emotions I was being presented with. There is no anger, disappointment, or any other negative emotion directed towards you, at all, as a result of last night, and there never was. Hell, my frustration was with myself, for being unable to deal, to help, to make anything better.

I also don't want to be away from you. Just my complete inability to be separate from you at all, is a cue that something is wrong with you right then. When I leave the room to get a drink or go to the bathroom, and you follow me, it means that you cant stand to be alone with yourself, or others, without me there to stand guard. It's a sign, kinda like the mushroom cloud = recent atomic explosion. It does not mean I don't want you there.

[guardiandragon]

LUFFS!!! I am here if you need me! We can make this work, together. You are not alone in the great big world, I promise!