I just wanted to make an electronic mental note ( Read more... )

i feel like i'm at a very definitive crossroads in my life.
and i don't know what to do at this point.
i really just want to do nothing.
i want a vacation.  i want a summer vacation.
i want to shun all responsibility.
and i have been, so far this week, very sucessfullly.
not for long, i fear.  there will be consequences.

I just want to be out of myself ( Read more... )

gone from my life

all at once you were everything;
anything minor, everthing unique.
Couldn't stop thinking about how it would be
if i were everything to you.

But i was only looking for the unattainable,
mistakes that i had made so many times before.
I just wanted a reason why I kept failing.
You were the perfect love, when love was not prevailing.

And now ( Read more... )

it's funny how a really pretty day can just wash everything bad away.  
it's as though any worries, any doubts about life just aren't... justified.

I think that over the summer, i want to segway from volunteering to activism.

mostly, I can't wait to get out of america and see how they do things in other places.
we watched a video about pepsi and coca- ( Read more... )

 so another birthday...

i don't know if i say this alot or not, but this year went by really fast.
I mean, i don't think that i say that alot, and i joke about time flying
and what not, but it seems like time has gone really slowly until
recently.  for example, it's been 5 years almost since i graduated
high school, but that actually DOES seem like a ( Read more... )

so the dreams may or may not be progressing in some way ( Read more... )

 there is nothing like this nothing.

There is no reason to try ot think,
to concentrate.
It's like trying to concentrate on a black dot
in a white room.
There is no black dot, anything you see,
you're making up.
Nothing work relying on, trying fo, being
good at, standing up to.
Nothing-doing because there's Nothing to do.

If this is what you want,
if this is ( Read more... )

 My dad's been in my dreams a lot lately.
I don't ever remember dreaming about, or in reference,
to him so much.
I think i've had at least 4 dreams over the past 3 weeks
that he was in, and then i remember another one not much
more than a month ago.
they have all been about strange topics, too.  In the latest one,
i was at my parents' house and i didn't ( Read more... )

what are we to each other?
thinking about it, i almost forgot the question.

i don't ever remember having as consistently snowy a winter as this.
I think it's pretty awesome, personally, and only midly depressing at times.
I mean, snow actually eliviates some of that winter depression because
it lightens up the world, and even if there's no sunshine, ( Read more... )

This is a work in progress....

Big Words

Sometimes there's a recession
in between the feeling and the sound.
Once I speak it,
once it's slipped past the tip of my lips,
Even my long tongue can't retrieve it.
I'm like a frog, though more ungraceful,
poking and proding my juicy organ
into the stale air, to no avail.
However I can taste the silence,
 the left ( Read more... )