Hi Everyone ( Read more... )

Last night was the first time I felt really upset. I haven't felt that low for ages! It's really hard not having Mike about, not just as a boyfriend I mean he's just always been around for me. It's weird. The people above our flat were fighting again in the early hours of the morning but I don't think it was for very long, if it was I slept through ( Read more... )

So I've just finished listening to Shostakovich 10 and I just can't believe that it's on my orchestral excerpt list this year. It's so difficult! I saw my teacher playing it in the last week of the Proms and it was incredible. I have so many excerpts this year, but it can only be a good thing considering I want to do orchestral work. It'll never ( Read more... )

My life is more complex than people think. I'm drunk again. Lots of drinking. I'm working so hard already. But everything confuses me. I feel sad when I should be happy. I'm such a fucking retard. Gash.

Things are ok. But not as good as they should be. And it's weird.

x

I'm bad. I've just put on The Best of Tower of Power which inevitably results in me dancing around like a giant penis. It's brilliant though.

I'm going to see Iain and Kate with Mike and Dan Czwartos which should be fun. Jackie's going to cook us dinner. I've done lots of house work today which is boring but I don't particularly mind because my ( Read more... )

spill your guts
Q. First thing you did this morning?: Continued watching Green Wing
Q. Last thing you ate?: Rice Crispies - I ran out of Bran Flakes and it makes me very sad indeed.
Q. What's something you look forward to most in the next month?: The gig on the 28th, starting college again (although I am also very very scared by this too), my mum ( Read more... )

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Whatever you do, don't listen to Philip Glass. He's a twat. Listen to John Adams. What is wrong with people?

x

So, to be honest everything is still utterly confusing and shitty. I'm getting by. It's just difficult. I've been keeping myself busy. I've seen Dan quite a lot which has been really great. I'm so glad we're still so close. I'm determined not to screw anything up and be a bitch. Because he's put up with enough of my stupidity. But I suppose things ( Read more... )

So, I'm pretty sure this whole episode hasn't really sunk in yet. I can feel it all looming though. It feels like in a few days I'm just going to go back to 'normal' life back up in Blackheath. It's been lovely speaking to him. I've done a lot of retail therapy with my mother which has helped (oh how shallow I can be) but I still have this deep ( Read more... )